Happiness can be likened to hidden treasure – and just like you would use a map to seek that treasure – you can seek happiness in life. The biggest question you are faced with when seeking happiness is how? How do I find that small nugget of happiness in a chaotic life?

Do I even have happiness in my life? Sometimes we can’t even see it. Just like someone looking for gold or some other treasure, you have to dig for it and keep searching until you find it. Put in a simpler way – you have to look for it.

It doesn’t have to be a big event that makes you happy either. It could be that your child learned to tie their shoes by themselves or that you stopped and took in the sunset at the end of a long day…and it made you smile. Maybe you helped someone and they thanked you for it.  It all starts with you! You have to be willing to open yourself up to finding those previously hidden “nuggets” of happiness.

Take the time to recognize and appreciate those moments in your life. You can even share your happiness with a friend or someone else in your life that you are close to if you want – they will be happy for you. This keeps the happiness going and your sharing it contributes to someone else’s happiness and well-being. Make the choice now to seek the happy moments in your life. They are there if you take the time to look.

Do you feel a small or large punch in your gut when you’ve seen someone who is doing what you want to do or someone you know who has gotten an opportunity that you want? Have you posted something in a group that you’re affiliated with and taken the initiative only to have them try to one up you?

You deserve the best in every aspect of your life and now is the time to get it. How?

This energy punch is a remnant from childhood and being told you did something wrong, from being let down and from being held back.

Here are a few very simple tools from our Paramitas the System to help. Fist, cut the cord to the event. Then erase the event and replace what was troublesome with a new image. If you don’t have a new image, use the word happy or peaceful or successful or courageous.

When you do this then you have taken away this energy that sucker punches you for the slightest thing.

Get your power back just by using these simple energy tools that are extremely powerful and will get you results immediately. The other person has their karma to deal with for taking something that is not theirs and you will have taken a much higher road with greater riches in the long run.

With winter and colder temperatures here to stay, you may be feeling what can be termed the winter blues or Seasonal Affective Disorder. However, you can find happiness despite these feelings.

How can you beat those winter blues? You might try a brisk walk or you could take up a winter sport. Just remember to adapt your exercise to winter conditions. Exercise releases endorphins, which keep you in a good mood and the effects can last long after your workout is done.

Learn something new by taking up a new hobby. This will make you feel good during the long months of winter. Don’t keep yourself from friends and family. Keep interacting with those you care about! Get some sun, even if it’s only a little bit. If you keep your shades up, you can bring a little bit of sunlight in to the room, too.

Feed your mind with things that are positive. Avoid negative news stories or books. This seems easy but you’ll be surprised what a difference it makes.

These are just a few of the things you can do to help conquer those winter blues. Try to enjoy winter as much as you can, even though it may seem difficult- those few months will pass before you know it.

The most common reason women are seeking to better themselves is because they want to live “on purpose”.  Meaning they want to be in line or working to develop their purpose for being, being here and doing what they are doing.

One of the reasons that people are so unhappy in their life is that they are living out of alignment with their purpose. For example, you work as an investment banker and yet you really want to be selling custom furniture where you are the designer of some pieces. This is an actual situation from a client of mine and we identified many aspects of why she was so distraught and accident-prone and that she was living out of alignment with her purpose.

The highest high and best vibration is when you live on purpose. Even if you aren’t ready to completely live your purpose it’s a good idea to get that energetic charge of doing something that is line with your purpose. And if you don’t know your purpose then that’s where you want to look up and receive the help you’ve been begging for.

Here is a tip to get to your purpose and get that vibe and energetic charge:

• My purpose is clear to me
• I am evolving toward my purpose with ease and Grace
• When I am living my purpose then I’ll feel that energy charge and recognize it, rather than ignore it.
• I am the person who is in the flow and allowing purpose to flow with me and toward me.

Let me know what your purpose is and your thoughts on how you are acting “on purpose”.

If you’ve been reading my blog for any period of time, you know that I write about inspiration and how to live a better life. Today, I want to share something personal with you, about health- yours and mine in particular.

Never before has our health been as important as it is today. Two-thirds of adults are either overweight or obese. In the past decade alone, the incidence of diabetes has grown a staggering 90%!

Today, a growing number of people are becoming aware that lifestyle choices can have a powerful effect on our health. Yet, many still eat a health-destroying diet rich in fat, salt, sugar and junk and rely on pills and procedures to treat the side effects.

More than twenty years ago, I decided to stop eating animal products. People generally decide to become vegan (consuming no animal products) for one of three reasons- their personal health, the environmental impact of an animal based diet, or out of compassion for the animals slaughtered. In my case, I initially decided to eat a plant-based diet because of the global environmental ramifications.

I was a strict vegan for about 15 years, but I added back fish… then seafood…. and then cheese. In the last few years since making those changes, I’ve passed the milestone 50 years of age, and have for the first time in my life, noticed signs of aging. My mother passed away and friends around me were getting sick. Rather than deal with the symptoms that come with age and bad habits, I wanted to fix the cause. 

A few weeks ago my husband and I watched a DVD called Forks Over Knives. T.Colin Campbell and Caldwell Esselstyn, Jr., M.D, two of the most respected health researchers, create the book and the DVD. I was not prepared for the impact that this DVD would have on my personal world.

Recently, I’ve been part of a support team for several patients dealing with stage 4 cancer of one kind or another. This DVD showed research from Campbell’s book, The China Study, as well as clinical research from Dr. Esselstyn that was simply irrefutable. The movie revealed how cancer and other diseases skyrocket when we eat meat and dairy, but plummet when a traditional plant-based diet is implemented.

It was a perfect reminder for me that there is nothing else we can do for our health that can match the benefits of a plant-based diet. Nothing, period.

The last thing I expected was for this movie to have a significant impact on my Midwestern, meat and potatoes husband who grew up raising cattle. But it did. So much so, that without my asking, he’s eaten only a plant-based diet ever since! He travels for a living and has even eaten plant-based while on the road- not just when it’s easy at home.

For me, I feel like I’ve come back home. Instead of the same habit of grilling a fish and serving it with some veggies, our meals now center on whole organic vegetables, grains, legumes and fruits. In addition to our regular Vitamix green smoothies, the last few days we’ve enjoyed a sweet potato/veggie lasagna, Indian lentil stew, yamadillas (yam quesadillas), stuffed acorn squash and even chocolate banana ice cream- made from frozen bananas with no dairy products. Yum!

My taste buds feel like they’ve been reborn! I’m excited to cook the next meal and create something that promotes such vitality! It’s almost like I can feel my cells saying, “YES!!!!” with each bite.

This time, while the environmental impact and the compassion for the animals is still a concern, I’m eating a plant-based diet for my health. The side benefit is that my footprint on our beautiful planet will be much smaller, and animals won’t need to suffer needlessly so that I can be unhealthy.

Already I feel lighter, more energized and healthier, and it’s only been two weeks! I’m inspired to live a healthy life and to share the benefits of a plant-based diet with you. Imagine being off of your medications… your cholesterol levels, blood sugars and weight being exactly where they’re supposed to be… these are just a few of the “side effects”. For me, that sure beats the list of side effects of any pharmaceutical drug!

I invite you to join me on this adventure. Buy the book or the DVD and ask yourself just one question…..

What if one simple change could save you from heart disease, diabetes and cancer?

Join me to take your health to the next level and please feel free to ask questions or comment below. I’m happy to support you and help in any way!

The best way that we can live an inspired life and be there for one another is to first take care of ourselves, and that starts with using our forks over knives.

Photo Credit: Ed Yourdon

You might be asking yourself, “How can I find happiness? What can I do right now to get the most happiness out of my life? Am I taking the time to enjoy the little, seemingly small moments in life that can bring me happiness?”

We can look at each question and try to answer each one, but remember everyone has different feelings as to what makes them happy. It’s like your unique fingerprint- no two are alike!

How can I find happiness? – You have to be open to looking for it in even the small things in your everyday life for one thing. What makes you happy may not be what makes someone else happy, but it’s okay. We are all unique and different.

What can I do right now to get the most happiness out of my life? – It all begins now.

• Look at the moments in your life now and enjoy them.

• Remember too that it all starts with you and you can choose happiness.

• Pay attention. Am I taking the time to enjoy the little, seemingly small moments in life that can bring me happiness?  Take the time to look for these and stop to enjoy them.

• It also means that you slow down in your day-to-day activities.

It’s really easy if you just take the time to think about it. I hope these questions and tips have helped you to start finding happiness in your life!

I have three scars on the inside edge of my left forearm. Two look like fading purple blotches, like sun-faded paint or the ancient scrawls of a fierce toddler armed with crayons.

The fierce toddler who put the pair of scars on my forearm was my sweet little Mikko McPuppers. He’s an eighteen-pound senior shih tzu. Usually he’s mellow. On the night he bit me though, he was disoriented. He didn’t know where we were going or how to get back, and I think an old fear of losing his home and family may have resurfaced.

We were in a strange truck in the middle of the night. He didn’t know why we changed vehicles or where we were headed. The floor was crowded and uncomfortable and the little bit of space on the seat was worse. For all he knew, he might never see our home again.

When my boy friend, Richard, got out to fill the gas tank, Mikko jumped into the driver’s seat. “You can’t sit there,” I said.

He put his head between his paws.

“Come on, Mikko. Get down.” When I got no response, I tugged on his collar. He snarled and leaped at me. I looked down and saw his teeth in my flesh. “No,” I screamed when I saw the crimson blood on my pale arm.

“Mikko!” I said. Though I sounded shocked the words “bad dog” did not occur to me. When he growls and bites he’s trying to protect himself or me.

I grabbed a Wet One to sop up the blood and disinfect the wound. I love Mikko dearly, but dog mouths carry germs.

He slunk over the console and onto the floor.  He knew he’d been a bad dog.

“What are you protecting us from?” I asked as I turned the Wet One over.

He looked up with eyes that said, “I’m sorry, Mommy. What’s going on?”

We were taking a risk, leaving for a weekend of camping in the middle of Friday night, but Richard had been busy with payroll and his estimated leaving time moved from 4:30 to 8:30. Mikko was still learning to share me with Uncle Daddy.

Mellow Mikko McPuppers

After the blood dried I noticed that the bite marks looked like single quotes around a much older scar, that I got almost 50 years ago on my last day at Kennolyn Camp.

We were in the rink, showing our families what we’d learned about riding, and Rockinghorse and I had just gone over a low jump, when I slid off his left side and landed on my arm. I started to get up, but when I pushed against it, nothing happened.

One of the counselors, a Stanford medical student, helped me up. He put my arm in a sling, and when they took it off at the doctor’s office, it was covered with blood. The bone had broken through the skin.

A small white line is still there. You had to know where to find it until Mikko’s teeth marks set it off.

I never used Neosporin to make them disappear. They remind me how much I love Mikko. I don’t carry a grudge. These scars have become pictures only I can see.

It’s better to embrace life and get scars than to sit on the sidelines and get nothing. Besides they remind me that the pain they cause is only temporary.

What scars (visible or not) have you acquired recently? Write and tell us how you acquired them and how you feel about them. Or write about anything. Thanks!

Our minds are the greatest tool we have and without the proper use of our mental energy, mental creativity and right mindset opportunities for mistakes arise. Those mistakes or missed opportunities lead to thousands of dollars in lost revenue and hundreds of hours of lost time.

Here are the mindset mistakes we make:

• Allowing others to steal your vision and your energy.
• Being overwhelmed because too many projects press on you that all seem important.
• Keeping the employee or contractor that is the least productive and who takes the greatest amount of your time.
• Refusal to delegate.
• Not asking for the money.

When your vision and purpose is getting interference from others is when you are at your weakest. This setting takes energy, time and money right out of our pockets.

Our mind creates the opportunity and it also creates the obstacle. When an obstacle is created by fear, we are imprinting that into every facet of our lives. We have many unhealthy mental beliefs that are important to release in order to achieve our highest potential and earn many thousands of dollars.

To step into your greatness and fullness of energy, mental clarity, and earning capacity and to achieve results, you must get clear minded. The clearer you are mentally the more clear your results. Better yet, the clearer your energy field is the more clear your mind and the more quickly the results just begin to appear.

Your outlook on life and overall well-being can be linked to your perspective. It goes back to the old question, Is the glass half full or half empty? What lens am I going to look at my life through? Will I choose the lens where I see the positive and cope with the negative to the best of my ability or the lens where I see the negative and can’t find the positive in my life?

In his talk The Last Lecture, Professor Randy Pausch talked about perspective and how to look at situations in life by introducing the Tigger vs. Eyeore debate. He said that people could choose to either be a Tigger – a person who looked for the positive things in their life and had a “bounce in their step” so to speak or they could be an Eyeore – and look at the negative things in life.

Yes, Professor Pausch dealt with a lot when facing his pancreatic cancer- and I am sure there were many days when he was nearly beaten down to his knees – maybe even wanting to take the Eyeore outlook on whatever he was going through, but somewhere inside himself he was able to get back up and look at everything from the Tigger perspective.

There may be days when it seems nearly impossible to find any positive thing in your life and it isn’t always easy, but you can choose how you perceive whatever you are facing. You can decide which side of the Tigger or Eyeore debate you are on. After all, happiness is an inside job.

To hear more from Randy Pausch, you can read his Today’s Brilliance right here on InspireMeToday.com, and listen to an interview with his co-author, Jeff Zaslow.

At the end of our path when we look back on life, we won’t remember the worry over the bills, the disappointment over not receiving the promotion, or the things that we might have judged as a “failure” in our life. What we will remember, are the moments that we loved, for love is truly the meaning of life.

At the core of every religion is one thing- love. When it comes down to it, love is the only thing that really matters. So, if we want to live a life that really matters, the most important question we can ask ourselves is….  ”Am I being loving in this moment?”

It’s easy to be loving when people are kind to us and things are going our way. It can be a challenge when life kicks us in the face. When someone cuts us off in traffic or steals our parking space, our default mode is usually one of anger rather than love. Instead of cursing that person, that’s the time to ask ourself, “What’s the most loving thing I could do right now?”  Not only will our kindness make it difference in their day, most important, it will make a difference in ours too!

The greatest gift we can give to one another is the gift of our kindness and our love. When we walk with compassion and kindness for others, the whole world is a better place for all of us.

Loving others starts with first loving ourself. Forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve made and let them go. See yourself as the magnificent being that you are, with unlimited potential and infinite possibility. Realize that you are so much more powerful than even your biggest problems. When we tap into the core essence of who we are, we feel better about ourselves and it’s easier to share love with others.

7 Steps to Bring Love Into Your Life NOW!

-       Start and end your day with gratitude. If what you focus on grows, let it be gratitude for the love in your life.

-       Apologize to those you have hurt and forgive those who have hurt you. Start each day with a clean slate and a heart overflowing with love.

-       Wear a smile as a badge of courage and don’t let anyone wipe it from your face. Be conscious of your smile and share it lovingly!

-       Surround yourself with loving people who support you and your growth.

-       Think kind thoughts. Our actions first begin as thoughts, so replace negative thoughts with loving kindness.

-       With every action and especially with our reactions, spread only love. If it’s not kind, don’t do it. Period.

-       Take love with you in all things that you do and leave only ripples of kindness behind you.

May your day overflow with love!

As you walk through life it is often wondered how I fit in, what is my mission, what is my purpose, and how can I earn more money. These thoughts get bantered around our heads a lot. Mostly when we are feeling low, down, or just plain stuck.

Being stuck is truly a sign of how little value we place on ourselves, our ideas, our options, and our abundance that we already have. Settling is just a bad habit that has been trained into our psyche and is an excuse to stay in a situation that doesn’t work for us.

Scientists have, at one time, calculated that we were valued at $32 in the chemical market. Today I believe those numbers would be somewhat greater but overall we often do not value ourselves even that much. If we did then some of those brilliant ideas floating around would come to fruition.

I recently read a line somewhere that stated the energy in our body could light the United States. What I discovered is that studies were done where a DuPont scientist said that the atoms of your body contain the potential energy of more than 11 million kilowatt hours per pound. So the overall estimate is that the average person is worth $85 billion dollars. Wow, we’ve so undervalued ourselves.

Some of us now and then tend to wonder what our mission in this life is, especially when we feel down, and we do not recognize how valuable a human being we really are. We come up with some great ideas, but feel they are not that good. If they were, someone else would come up with them. It’s too bad that, almost always, we place little value on our ideas and ourselves.

The value we place on ourselves come from external standards. Parents, media, and The Joneses help us place standards on our selves. Begin to think, every day; I am valuable just as I am. You will find that new opportunities arise at the least expected moments.

The electronics in our body are really just energy and we can turn it off or we can turn it on. That energy can be directed in positive ways or negative ways. By directing that energy into a positive avenue you have less friction. For example you feel worried by all the media hype around the economy. What then happens is that you attract worry energy around you. I often tell mothers of my youngest clients (kids) to turn the television off for 2 months and see how the behavior of that child changes. Miraculous changes occur and they are more energetic and happier. When we are happier and without so much friction we value ourselves more.

Leave out the external electronics in your world for a week and see what wonderful things occur. Eliminate the electrical items in your bedroom alone and you will sleep much better. Stop listening to the radio while driving and you will arrive at your destination much more easily and actually calmly. The friction will decrease and the value increases. Energy can then flow more easily.

Your energy body will thank you and actually increase because you are leaving out external forces. When your energy body is more fluid your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual self is more healthy and vibrant. This is one reason nature is so good for us. It’s about the energy that we are absorbing from nature but it is also about the body recouping by being un-plugged.

Value your energy and your value goes up. Learn that there are methods where you can actually master your energy.

Why has it taken me three months to respond to Kristan’s lovely invitation, overcome my fear, and become a blogger here?

• Fear of technology.
• Fear of glitches.
• Fear of the unknown.

I love technology, but it scares me. Change scares me. The unknown scares me. Glitches with no solution scare me. And beneath all that, the fear of looking like a fool scares me. I’m working on overcoming all of this.

Machines always seem to have a mind of their own. I don’t control them. I can’t even ask them what’s wrong, what they need, or why they won’t cooperate.

So I put the blog for Inspire Me Today on a back burner, even though people have been urging me to blog for years. I procrastinated. The lure of more readers was tiny compared to my fears. What if the “submit” button was missing or the directions included technical jargon that I could not decode?

I was afraid of failing. I was afraid of making a mistake and looking stupid, a fear that should have dissolved at least forty years ago.

I crossed one item after another off of my “to-do” list while I ignored “Blog for Inspire Me Today.” I let my conscience nag at me. Finally on Friday, January 13, 2012, I told myself to give blogging an hour. Find out what the problems are, I said as I finished my morning journaling. Once you know what you’re up against, you can ask for help.

I keep getting better and better at asking for help because I’m surrounded by friends who do that. My boyfriend trouble-shoots. He’s always on the phone answering questions and assigning jobs. A neighbor, who is a research librarian, helps college students find information efficiently. Sales clerks answer questions, bag boys carry groceries to the car, and the clerks at Starbuck’s know me as the woman who wants half-caf—half decaf. We are here to help each other, but no one can help until I dig into a task and identify problems.

Kristan, thanks for keeping the opportunity open while I found the time and the courage to take up blogging.  If this goes through, I’m living proof that blogging is fun, entertaining, and sometimes even inspiring.

Conquering one challenge always give me the courage to try another. Are you the same way? What challenges have you faced recently and what have you done about them? Write back and let me know, okay? I’d love to know how the readers here are meeting and conquering challenges, so please share. Thanks!

Photo Credit: Max Elman

In January of 2007, after being divorced for 7 years, I made a conscious choice to find love. Being an impatient person, I wanted a great relationship – and I wanted it now, so I entered the world of internet dating.

I started by creating a vision board, that had a lot of little things and 4 main items-  a home in the mountains of Colorado, a black X-5 BMW, a handsome dark haired man and, figuring that if you’re going to dream, you might as well dream BIG… I included a photo of a Gulfstream airplane, because I love to fly.

Within a week I found the home in Colorado, met the dark haired man, and get this…. he drove a black X-5 BMW (which is now my car) and he flew a Gulfstream airplane. Spooky? It gets even better. He moved in within 3 weeks and we were married on the anniversary of our first date. It’s been almost five years and we’ve never been happier.

So many people look at our relationship and have asked me to share how we did it.

What are the secrets to finding the love of your life online? 

For me, I just looked at the principles that were successful for me in business, and applied them to finding love. Coming from a left-brained, linear thinking real estate background, I simply applied logic to love…. and it worked, not only for me, but also for friends who have tried the same thing.

Due to your numerous requests, I’ve created an easy, step-by-step course called Love In 21 Days.

This Thursday, January 26th at 1pmPT I’m hosting a FREE call to talk about how I did it, share information with you on how you can do it too, and answer your questions. 

This is a big deal here at InspireMeToday.com, as this is our first course offering EVER. My team talked me into sharing this information, because it can help so many people find love. They even went as far as to tell me it would be selfish NOT to share it!

So, it is with great excitement that I’m inviting you to join me on the call this Thursday, January 26th at 1pmPST. Just sign up at LoveIn21Days.com and we’ll send you the call in information. On the call, you’ll be able to hear how I did it, ask your personal questions and also meet our two guest hosts, Jason Selk, the sports psychologist behind the World Series winning St. Louis Cardinals, and award-winning actress Mariel Hemingway. The call will be hosted by UK radio host, Lynn Serafinn.

Just imagine, by Valentine’s Day THIS YEAR, you could be in love!

I know how much joy my husband has brought into my life, and I want the same thing for you too. I’m here to help and support you in any way that I can, so please share your comments below or join me on the call this Thursday. Love in 21 Days is not only possible, with our daily course and support, I believe it’s also probable!

Love is waiting for you… what are you waiting for?

I can’t wait to celebrate your success!

With love and hugs,

Gail

Here’s what Happy really stands for.

H - Hopeful. Be hopeful that your dreams can and will come true. That each day will bring you something to look forward to.

A - Adventurous. Never be afraid to do something new. Don’t let negative thoughts hold you back or produce fear in trying something you haven’t tried before.

P – Positive. Be positive whenever possible. Positive things produce positive people – it’s contagious!

P - People. Surround yourself with people who make you happy. Also with those who are generally positive. Remember that we can all help each other.

Y - You. Being happy starts with you. Only you can choose whether you will be happy or not. You may be influenced by other people’s attitudes and feelings, but they can’t make you any one thing. You have the power to insert positive or negative experiences, attitudes and influences in your life. In the end, it all begins with you!

Are you ready to transform your life? Are you ready to open your arms and bring an abundance of joy, love, happiness, success and material wealth into your life? Are you ready to start living the life you want, not the life you have? Creating a wonderful life doesn’t just happen. It comes from choices you make everyday – even the smallest choices can have the biggest results

One of the most energy sapping things you can do is procrastinate. But how to stop is the real issue.

Here are some surefire ways to end that nagging issue of procrastinating.

Past – Avoiding things works because doing something may cause fear, anxiety and make us just feel bad. Many people feel, “I’m not doing something right” or “I won’t do it right anyway” so I’ll avoid doing it at all.

Solution – Anxiety is just fight or flight and fear is something I can push through and have a victory on the other side.

—–

Past – It has to be perfect. I don’t want to do anything unless it’s perfect. I’ll get in trouble if it’s not perfect.

Solution – Do the best you can, as that is perfection in itself. Perfection is just a tactic to stop myself from moving forward. It really is much easier than it is in your head.

—–

Past – Failure is death and I must not fail. I won’t do it because I might fail. If I do succeed it would be a miracle and miracles just don’t happen to me.

Solution – It is good to be human. Humans have been failing for millennia and your failure is actually your reward to a much better situation because you have failed before and you are still alive.

—–

Past – I shouldn’t have to. I’ve already gained experience in so many areas and I just shouldn’t have to, so I won’t. If it feels uncomfortable I shouldn’t have to do it. I only want happy and fun.

Solution – All you need is 20 seconds of courage. Sometimes doing things I need to do is a fantastic feeling. The sooner it’s done the sooner I get to my fun. Might as well have fun sooner.

—–

Past – It doesn’t feel right. The stars, moon and right time just haven’t shown up and if I wait it will show up.

Solution – Waiting is over -the time is NOW. Your fear and anxiety are fantastic excuses to wait but doing it now is the exact right time. If you are in fear, you are in the future. Get grounded, get it done and move on. Life will be that much more rewarding and fun.

When you walk into an office, a store or someone’s home, you immediately get a sense for that place. It might be warm and welcoming or cold and filled with tension. You automatically use all your senses to develop a feeling for a place.If you are a parent, you are a leader in your family. You have the primarily responsibility for setting the tone in your home. How does your home feel? Is it a warm, welcoming place for everyone in your family?

A Home Filled with Tension

One mom told me about all the stress in her home. One of her three sons was doing very poorly in school. She and her husband were constantly nagging Joe to do his homework although it didn’t seem to help much. Sometimes Joe even skipped school and they responded by yelling at him and grounding him.

However, Joe would leave the house even though he was grounded. Home was not a welcoming place for Joe. This family turned things around when they made the tough decision to let Joe worry about his homework and grades instead of them. When they stopped nagging him, he started spending more time at home and he actually began taking more responsibility for his homework.

Replacing Negative Statements with Positive Statements

Sometimes parents get in the habit of interacting with their children using negative statements and commands. Read the following statements one dad made to his children and think about how you would feel if you were a child hearing these remarks:

• “You aren’t going outside until you put sunscreen on.”
• “Stop messing around with that!”
• “If you don’t hurry up and get your shoes on, I’m not taking you.”
• “You’ve already watched too much TV. You should not have turned it on again, now turn it off.”
• “You’re not eating dinner until you wash your hands.”
• “You are dawdling and we’re going to be late!”
• “Stop bugging your sister!”

How do you feel after reading these statements?

Let’s look at how these same ideas could be expressed more positively:

• “Feel free to go outside as soon as you put sunscreen on.”
• “That could break so you can play with this instead.”
• “I am leaving in two minutes. I’ll be happy to take you if you have your shoes on.”
• “Your TV time is up for today. Would you like to turn the TV off or would you like me to turn it off?”
• “Please wash your hands and then join us for dinner.”
• “We’re leaving in 5 minutes. Do you plan to be dressed or will you be taking your clothes in a bag?”
• “Your sister wants to be left alone right now. Do you want to play a game with me or go outside and play?”

How do you feel now? The words we use make a huge difference!

Results of Positive Statements

When we use more positive statements we demonstrate confidence that our children are likely to choose appropriate behavior. If we instead use a lot of nagging, ordering and yelling, we convey to our children that we feel they are likely to mess up if we’re not constantly on top of them – not quite the message we want to send!

By getting in the habit of positively stating requests, you will make the overall tone of your family more encouraging and optimistic. This is an essential ingredient in making your home a warm, welcoming place for everyone.

Now is the time when we all want to start our New Year’s resolutions. I agree that making positive changes and setting goals is a very good thing to do; however, it is important to do this all year round.

We become these excited little souls and we make big lists of the positive things we are going to change about ourselves in 2012. First thing I want to share about this is, YOU are already perfect the way you are and if you feel like making a few adjustments in areas of your life that is wonderful… However, please remind yourself that you are already perfect and that you are just deciding to show more love to yourself.

My concern is that only about 5-10% actually stick with their resolutions up to the end of February because they have made such huge lists in January rather than spreading it out over the year. Then comes our ego, making us feel like failures and that we are not strong enough to accomplish our goals. When it comes to setting goals for yourself, focus on solutions, NOT problems.

Be sure to take it slowly with any goals you may have. For example, if one wants to become more connected to the divine, it’s important to start meditations for only 3 minutes a day visualizing and seeing yourself already having a clearer connection, and then increase the time as the weeks go by.

If we run out to the store to buy all these books and start to force the connection, we are actually working against the flow of life. Just like if you start to workout really hard your body will tire out after a month. Our egos love to feed on this energy, so please be gentle with yourself and know that simple, easy steps are the way to make changes that will stick and become a part of your energy field and eventually a part of who you are.

I send you all huge waves of positive energy to achieve your goals (remember to do affirmations about your goals; this will help keep you focused).

One of the best things to do to keep you focused is to show yourself love everyday. Wrap your arms around yourself and say to yourself “I love you; just the way you are”.

A very Happy New Year to you all and sending you all blessings of great new adventures, love and joy.

Photo Credit: Max Elman

Every once in a while we all need to take the time to do some self-reflection and evaluating in our lives. Maybe you aren’t as happy as you used to be or just can’t find that happy moment in your life that used to be there.

You might ask yourself: How can I find happiness?

Try looking at the little things- the first word from your child, a beautiful sunset or something else that while seeming to be small can bring a smile to your face even for just a minute. Am I looking for the happiness that is in my life? There may be a hidden “gem” in your life that you hadn’t even thought brought you happiness. As with the last question, it can be found in the smallest things….and when you least expect it.

Do I focus only on the negative events in my life? This isn’t to say there won’t be negative moments in life – it’s just a part of the overall human experience – but you can choose how negative events affect you and look for the positive ones.

Happiness is a perpetually present choice we make. Happiness can exist alongside adversity. Granted, some moments in life are happier than others. However, it is our personally empowered outlook of the situation that can make all the difference. True happiness comes from within and coexists with the ups and downs of life.

These are just a few of the questions you might ask yourself when it feels as though there is little or no happiness in your life. Remember to take the time and reflect as well as enjoy those happy moments. You may even want to make a happiness journal in which you write down one or two things that made you happy that day. Then when you have a low moment in your day, you can pull out your journal and reflect back on that event that made you happy.

Most people tend to get run down from all the pre-holiday festivities. This time of year is when the body and mind are exhausted and ready for winter rest. Rather than tax your system even more, take this opportunity after the holiday rush to relax a bit and allow the energy that you’ve sent out to family, friends, loved ones create a tone of positive and sharing energy for the following year.

Here are some tips to keep your energy high and healthy after the holiday festivities:

• Take daily baths with salt and a favorite essential oil (lavender, rose, or bergamot work well to relax the muscles and mind).
• Eat more greens. After such sweet filled days your body needs the regenerative qualities of greens. If you don’t like greens then take a scoopful of supergreen food blend and drink it in your apple cider.
• Make an effort to continue giving back to your community in the form of service or donations. Giving is wonderful and can be energetically cumulative by doing so on a regular and consistent basis.
• Take plenty of water daily to keep your body regulated and releasing toxins that have accumulated.
• Take a nap and allow yourself the luxury of no television or outside stimulus. This will generate a great deal of good for your body and mind and you will feel reinvigorated.
• Walk around the block a few times each day. If it’s cold then bundle up. If you don’t like to go alone get a buddy to walk with you. Take one of your children and spend time with them walking.
• Take 2 minutes a day and just do some abdominal breathing. Learn how to use your breath to restore your body and mind by taking a meditation class.

Now is the ideal time to restart and give your body and brain a boost for the coming year. Join me in giving your body, mind and spirit the refreshment it deserves and you will have the best year ever.

Desiring happiness for their children is a goal shared by most parents. However, when parents focus too much energy on ensuring their children’s happiness, they can unintentionally produce the exact opposite results. How can this possibly happen?

What the Research Shows

Although it seems that children who have their basic needs met plus enjoy many extras would certainly be happy, this appears to not be the case.

The United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention surveyed over 14,000 students in grades 9-12 in 2007. They reported “During the 12 months before the survey, 28.5% of students nationwide had felt so sad or hopeless almost every day for 2 or more weeks in a row that they stopped doing some usual activities.”

How do parents play a role?

Loving parents can unintentionally raise self-centered, unhappy children. One way it happens is when parents continually give their children the message that the children’s needs, desires and happiness are superior over anyone else’s. These children grow up learning to focus on themselves, not others.

I’ve heard many sad stories of parents who bent over backwards to give their children everything they could possibly want only to have their children grow into self-centered adults. These adult children often take their parents for granted and rarely pay attention to their parents needs. Instead they focus on their own needs.

One mom sadly explained how her 30-year-old son had flown home for Christmas. Mom had planned a big gathering and was busy with preparations. Her son left in an angry huff before the Christmas dinner complaining that his mom wasn’t spending enough time with him!

She reflected that she had always done so many things for him so that he would be happy. She didn’t think of asking for his help with dinner and clearly he didn’t think of it either. They both ended up being very unhappy that day.

What should we wish for our kids instead of happiness?

The answer to this question is discussed in Dr. Aaron Cooper and Eric Keitel’s book titled I Just Want My Kids to Be Happy! Why You Shouldn’t Say It, Why You Shouldn’t Think It, What You Should Embrace Instead. They analyze some of the negative effects of putting our kids’ happiness first and present healthier alternatives.

Based on their review of decades of research on happiness, they suggest there are eight key ingredients to authentic happiness:

• Good mental and physical health
• A life of meaning
• Closeness to others
• Acts of loving kindness
• A sense of gratitude
• A sense of spirituality
• An optimistic outlook
• Gratifying pursuits

They examine how parents can help their children develop in each of these areas. Ultimately building these skills will help our children achieve a lifetime of real happiness.

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

With the new year just beginning, here are some tips to keeping the resolution you made for the New Year and how to be happy.

• Be specific. Instead of saying that you will “make friends” resolve to remember friends’ birthdays and anniversaries or friends’ kid’s birthdays. It will make things a lot easier for you.
• Write it down. Make sure it is somewhere where you will see it often – this will remind you of the resolution you’ve made. To go along with this…
• Review your resolution constantly. If your resolution is buzzing through your head, it’s easier to stick to it. You may want to review your resolution just before you go to bed at night or first thing in the morning, whatever works best.
• Hold yourself accountable. Tell other people about your resolution and score yourself on a chart or other method — whatever works for you to make yourself feel accountable for success and failure.
• Think BIG! Maybe you need a big change, a big adventure – a trip to a foreign place, learning a new language that you can use in that foreign country, etc. Anything is possible!
• Think small. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that only big change can make a difference. Just keeping your fridge cleared out could give you a real boost.
• Ask for help. Why is this so hard? You’ll be amazed at what asking for help can do, especially if you are feeling overwhelmed.

Do you ever wish your children were more motivated in school, sports or playing an instrument? Many parents try hard to motivate their kids by giving rewards to encourage certain behavior or threatening punishments. Rewards and punishments involve external motivation which children often rebel against leaving parents feeling frustrated.

Understanding Internal Motivation

Ideas about motivation are changing as new research teases out some of the key elements. According to Daniel Pink’s latest book, Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us, trying to motivate children using external rewards and punishment is a mistake. The secret for motivating children to high performance lies in allowing their own internal drives direct their behavior.

Pink describes three elements of true motivation:

• Autonomy – the need to direct our own lives
• Mastery – the desire to make progress in one’s work
• Purpose – the ability to positively impact ourselves and our world

For example, if you want your child to practice the piano more, try allowing her to choose when to practice, what music to focus on and where to perform that will bring delight to someone else.

Trying to Control Too Much

When we try to motivate our children, it sometimes backfires as they dig in their heels and refuse to buckle under the pressure. By attempting to exert control over our children’s behavior, we are reducing their autonomy – one of the key elements of internal motivation.

One mom was describing her frustration in getting her daughter to practice the piano. No matter how hard she tried her daughter sat on the piano bench refusing to put her fingers on the keys. This is a typical control battle and one that mom is likely to lose since her daughter ultimately controls what she does with her fingers!

How do we know when we’ve stepped over the line and are trying to control too much of our children’s behavior? Luckily children are pretty good at letting us know when we’ve stepped over that line. If you hear your child saying any of the following, you’re probably over the line:

• “You’re not the boss of me!”
• “I’m not going to do that!”
• “You can’t make me.”
• “Why do you always get to choose?”

At this point it is wise to take a step back and look at what we are trying to accomplish and consider other approaches.

Motivating to Perfection

Psychologist Robert W. Hill of Appalachian State University found that when people are trying hard because of their own desire for excellence, this effort can lead to greater satisfaction and mental health. However, if the pressure to perform is coming from others, it’s likely to lead to dissatisfaction and reduced well-being.

In the article “The Two Faces of Perfection”, Hill is quoted as saying

“Kids need to get the message, ‘You need to have high standards, but you don’t need to be perfect.’ If you have unreachable goals and you’re constantly dissatisfied with yourself, you can be miserable. Unequivocally, you don’t want a parent who is constantly criticizing, so the child develops a self-scrutiny that always finds fault with their own performance.”

While we all want our children to try hard and make good choices, in order to accomplish this we need to allow them to practice making those choices. Some of the choices they make will not be so good and that will give them an opportunity to learn from their mistakes.

By giving our children the chance to develop their self-motivation, we encourage them to grow and find their own internal strengths.

If you find it difficult to keep your resolutions and you have a habit of breaking them, try the following:

Make only positive resolutions, such as “Go to more movies” or “Have friends over for a meal.”

Make it something that you would find enjoyable to keep. Give up a resolution if necessary. If you find yourself constantly breaking a specific resolution then consider giving it up completely. Don’t let an unfulfilled resolution to lose five pounds block you from making other, smaller resolutions that might give you a happiness boost.

Every day keep your resolution. It’s often easier to do something every day – whether it’s exercising, laundry or something else. This creates a routine and a sense of balance in your life. Set a deadline – and Don’t give up if something interferes with that deadline.

Keep this quote by Voltaire in mind- “Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.”

If you decide that you are going to clean out your house, start small by tackling one room at a time. Maybe you’ll start with a smaller room first so you won’t feel so overwhelmed.

These are just a few tips to help you keep that resolution you’ve made for yourself. You may find other strategies that work better for yourself, and that’s okay.

Below are some of the things that come to mind for my family when things are going well.

Everyone is

• pitching in with household tasks
• joining the family for meals
• acting respectful
• feeling supported and loved
• remembering to let the rest of the family know where they are and when they’ll be home
• feeling like they have enough time and don’t have to rush
• healthy, getting enough rest and exercise
• having some time for fun

Do these things happen all the time? No, but when they do happen, our family atmosphere is more pleasant.

Beginning with Changing Yourself What changes could you make to your own behavior which would positively impact your family? Since you absolutely control your own behavior, you can make these changes happen!

Gretchen Rubin invested a year working on changing her life for the better. Each month she focused on a different part of her life and described her journey in The Happiness Project. She tackled things like going to bed earlier, organizing her things, asking for help, stopping nagging, acknowledging people’s feelings and taking time to be silly.

Each month she had a different focus. For example for April she wrote, “My goal for April, the month dedicated to parenthood? To become more tender and playful with my two daughters. I wanted a peaceful, cheerful, even joyous atmosphere at home – and I knew that nagging and yelling weren’t the way to achieve that.”

She thought of various ways to become more tender and playful with her daughters. She kept a log of her goals and regularly checked off how she was doing on each goal. Keeping a log gave her a way of staying accountable for her goals.

Changes that Involve the Entire Family

I’ve recently spoken to a couple different moms who are very unhappy with how isolated their family members have become. Although they all live in the same house, they rarely share time together. Most of the time, each child and parent eats dinner by themselves.

These situations have been exacerbated by technology – parents and children with their own computers, video games and TV. Over time each family member has become increasingly interested in spending time alone with their technology of choice.

Making changes that involve the entire family will take everyone’s cooperation. One way to begin the process is with a family meeting. Establishing regular family meetings is useful for making significant changes. Family meetings provide a structure that allows problems to be expressed, solutions to be brainstormed and implemented ideas to be evaluated.

Will it be easy? No. Will it be worth it? When someone in the family is seriously unhappy, ignoring the elephant in the room does not make it go away. In fact, the elephant is likely to stampede making a huge mess at the most inopportune time.

Choosing One Thing to Change

If you could only choose to make one change in your family, what would it be? You are more likely to be successful if you focus on one item at a time. Making any change takes time and plenty of practice.

It can also be helpful to find someone outside your family who can give you support on the changes you are trying to make. May this year be the one where your family makes many changes for the better!

Each day, with every action or inaction, whether intentional or not, we change the world around us. With every smile or grouchy comment, we affect others and as they pass it on, we change the world around us.

We’ve all heard the expression that we’re all one, and what we reap we sow, yet sometimes they sound like just expressions and we lose the meaning behind the words. But, when you go a level deeper, it’s so obvious that everything we do affects those around us.

If we’re snippy to the woman at the coffee shop, we affect her day in a negative way. She then passes along our negative energy and grouchy disposition to her next customer, until someone chooses to break the chain.

Fortunately, we also have the power to influence for good. Imagine walking into your local coffee shop with a smile and a kind, giving attitude. Be present and actually communicate with those around you. They will feel validated, cared for and happy and will pass THAT attitude on to those they meet throughout the day.

People WANT to be around those who behave in such a positive way. We feel good being in their presence, and many times, their behavior affects our attitude.

We create ripples by just being alive.

If we could follow the goodness we create with our happy, positive, upbeat attitude, it would be interesting to track the levels. For example, if we’re kind to the woman at the coffee shop, she’s then super sweet to the next customer who walked in having a bad day. Instead of that customer leaving and continuing with their bad day, they now take some love with them to share with their next interaction.  And so it goes, on and on, around the world.

With just one kind interaction, we have the potential of affecting literally thousands of people each day.

When we’re conscious of the impact that we have on one another, we behave differently. If you think about it, knowing that your next interaction will be passed on the thousands of people today, aren’t you inspired to make sure that it’s a positive one?

You hold the power in your hands to change the world. So please, for the sake of all of us, let’s smile, be kind and make sure that we treat each other with love and respect, creating happy ripples throughout the world.

So go forth into your day today and be the stone tossed into the lake, creating happy ripples wherever you go. And, know that it’s appreciate by all of us.

We have been receiving so many questions from members of our community that we decided to add a new feature to our site called Ask Gail. It is our hope that this information will be helpful not only to the individual who asked the original question, but also for the entire community. Please feel free to email your questions to gail+askinspiremetodaycom and we’ll do our best to answer yours in an upcoming post. Thank you!

Today’s question comes to us from Michelle:

“Okay all. I’ve been known at times as the “glass is half full person”, but the theory of abundance isn’t saving the Arctic, or the homeless, or the abused. I’m not a hand wringer, though. I put out my voice, take action, and share and donate time and money. I wonder how many of these new age philosophers, pulled themselves up or luckily had access to education or seed money for businesses. There’s a major piece of compassion missing here for everyone who doesn’t believe in new age spiritualism. Is their lack of belief justification for homelessness, being downsized, no medical care, food, clothing? Please respond.”

Michelle, thanks for your question. I have had the fortune to interview some of the most amazing people in the world for InspireMeToday.com, and some of the things that unite all of the them are their compassion and their strong desire to help others.

First, I can tell you from personal experience and from listening to the stories of countless Luminaries, that no one goes through life without adversity. We all deal with it in some form or another, but what makes us different from one another, is how we choose to react when life smacks us in the face. If you’ve read any of my blogs or listened to the interviews featured on our site, there are many luminaries featured who have come through hard times- me included. Personally, I gone through unemployment, bankruptcy, rape, divorce (2 of them!), while living in 10 states over the last 25 years…. and it wasn’t until I embraced some of these principles that my life turned around. Abundance is all around us- we just have to be open to it and see it before it shows up, or what I call “celebrating in advance”.

If I understand you correctly, you’re asking how people can talk about having abundance in their lives- and how easy it is to manifest, when the world is full of greed and people are starving. I get it. It’s a real quandary for many. We struggle with the balance of abundance, and many folks with whether or not they are deserving of wealth when so many are hurting.

I believe the best thing we can do is to have an open heart and an abundant attitude. In other words, create your vision and go for the things you want in life- material and otherwise. Your taking a deep breath of air doesn’t diminish my ability to do so too. Abundance is the same way, in that it is here for all of us. One person creating it in their life doesn’t mean that we can’t, and vice versa.

You’re right in that some people don’t have the desire or the ability to learn and practice these principles and they live a life of need. The best thing we can do to help them is to create abundant lives for ourselves (so we don’t use the resources for those truly in need), and also, to reach out to help those less fortunate. A homeless person’s lack of belief is not justification for being homeless, but rather, an opportunity for those who are blessed with abundance to teach and to share. The more abundance we create in our lives, the more we have to share with others.

I should also point out that being financially well off and living a life of abundance are not the same thing. Those that truly live a life of abundance are not greedy, for they understand that giving is an equally important part of receiving.

Sometimes it does seem counter-intuitive to “think happy thoughts” when you’re not, or feel abundant when your bank account is empty. But I can promise you that if you’re able to “fake it until you make it”, it works. Studies have proven that when you celebrate life in advance, good things come your way.

I hope this answers your question.

Hugs,

Gail

P.S. Please share your opinion on the topic too… by commenting below. Thank you!

Photo Credit: Max Elman

You are feeling stressed and it seems like you don’t have enough time to get everything done during this holiday season. You still have presents to get and you wonder if you will have enough money to buy all the presents for your family and friends.

Before the stress overwhelms you, stop for a minute and take a deep breath. It’s time to focus on what’s important during this time of year. It isn’t the things we have that matters the most, it is the people we have in our lives. Take the time during this holiday season to spend time with your family and friends and show appreciation to those people who matter in your life.

Another way to take the focus off of things and put it toward the people in our lives is to not focus on physical gifts that we exchange but on the quality time we spend with one another by playing games or singing songs. You will have fun and at the same time you will be saving money. You could spend time as a family baking your favorite cookies and sharing stories of past holidays while doing so, too.

Remember too that you can do something as simple as sharing a smile with someone – you might try doing that with the cashier at the department store when you are in a long line buying a present this holiday season. Smiles cost nothing and can brighten someone else’s day!

How often are your children thinking negative thoughts about themselves? Sometimes you know their thoughts are negative because they blurt out something like “I’ll never get this!” As they grow up, your children will be their own harshest critics. It is their own negative self-talk that they will hear most often.

Everyone’s mind produces a steady stream of thoughts. When these thoughts turn negative, fear, doubt and frustration quickly sets in. Stopping negative thoughts isn’t easy and it starts with actually noticing those thoughts.What are your kids saying to themselves?

What your children say out loud gives you insight into what they are thinking. You know they are engaging in negative self-talk when you hear things like:

• “This is too hard!”
• “Nobody likes me.”
• “I can’t do it!”

Whether our children are struggling with school work, relationships or athletics, their thoughts can help or hinder them. Peter McWilliams put it this way, “Our thoughts create our reality — where we put our focus is the direction we tend to go.”

Dr. Alison Arnold came to my daughter’s gymnastics center to work with the kids on the mental side of gymnastics. Like so many athletes, gymnasts need to be in control of their thoughts if they are to give their best performance.Negative thoughts like these wreck havoc on a gymnast’s routine:

• “I’m going to mess up.”
• “She’s so much better than me.”
• “It’s too difficult for me.”

When negative thinking takes over, the likelihood of getting injured is increased. You definitely do not want your daughter having negative thoughts right before she does a backhand spring on the beam!

How can you help your children change their self-talk from negative to positive?

There is a Zen concept called the Monkey Mind. It’s the part of your brain that races from one idea to the next, chattering endlessly, craving things, being unsatisfied and judgmental. Dr. Arnold used this concept to explain negative thinking to the kids. Negative thoughts are like a naughty monkey running away instead of focusing on the task at hand.

What can you do once you notice your Monkey Mind is off in the weeds? You need to flip your negative thinking.

Dr. Arnold discussed a three step process for flipping negative thinking:

• Take a deep breath.
• Think to yourself “Stop. Relax.”
• Say something positive to yourself like “I can handle this.” or “I am strong.”

By following this process, the kids learned how to stop their negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones.

What are you saying to yourself about your kids?

It’s every bit as important to watch out for your own negative thoughts. One of the worst patterns parents can get into is continually thinking about their children’s faults.

One mom of three children complained she couldn’t stop thinking about how they really weren’t measuring up like she had hoped. Despite her children’s many achievements, she struggled to control her negative thoughts. This led to nagging them, lecturing them and pointing out where they needed to improve. However, none of her efforts seemed to change their behavior.

What you say to your children has a big impact on them. By making more positive comments, you can help them develop more positive self-talk. One way to do this is simply describing their positive behavior:

• “You sat down, got out your math book and started working on your homework.”
• “You shared the truck with your friend.”
• “You waited patiently for your turn to go down the slide.”
• “You helped set the table for dinner. I appreciate that.”

Practice making positive comments to your children every day. Your positive comments will help both you and your children focus on what’s right instead of what’s wrong. As your children spend more time thinking positively they’ll have less time for any negative thoughts!

We have been receiving so many questions from members of our community, that we decided to add a new feature to our site, called “Ask Gail”. It is our hope that this information will be helpful not only to the individual who asked the original question, but also for the entire community. Please feel free to email your questions to gail+askinspiremetodaycom and we’ll do our best to answer yours in an upcoming post. Thank you!

Linda asked….

“My thoughts of joy and peace are fleeting. Usually I am thinking and thinking. Unable to stop and smell the flowers. Although I do work on feeling grateful. Do you think it will start to come naturally? ”

Linda, any time we start a new practice, it takes a bit of time before it becomes a natural process. Our brain is literally wired the way it is because of the thoughts and  habits that we have formed in our past.

The good news is, we can rewire it at any time simply by consciously changing the way we think. It’s the same as joining a gym and wondering if you’re going to get in shape in a week. Gratitude, just like lifting weights, becomes easier the more we do it.  It’s all about creating a habit to form new neural pathways in our brain.

I truly believe that the number one thing we can all do to improve our own individual lives is to take the time to express gratitude.

In other words, make it a practice each and every day.  As soon as you wake in the morning, review in your mind the things that you are grateful for in your life. As you close your eyes to sleep, think of the best part of your day, and again, of the things that you are the most grateful for in your life. As we think of the most wonderful parts of our life, we can’t help but smile and feel good inside. From that good feeling, our thoughts and our behavior will change.

If thoughts of lack or yucky stuff comes up, don’t beat yourself up. Just let it go and return to the thoughts of gratitude. Eventually they’ll become second nature to you. And the coolest side effect is that your life will improve dramatically in all areas.

As you do this daily practice more and more, you’ll find that gratitude, peace of mind and stress relief will soon become a part of your everyday life.

So, tonight as you fall asleep, try this practice and let me know how it works for you. Thanks again for reaching out to us and for being a part of the InspireMeToday.com community.

Hugs,

Gail

p.s. Want to add your answer? Please feel free to add your wisdom below in the comment section. Thank you!

Optimism can and does make a difference. If you don’t believe me, try looking at others around you. By observing others’ optimism, you will most often find that those who are happy have a better outlook on life as well as being healthier- physically and emotionally.

Michael J. Fox has a book called Always Looking Up: The Adventures of An Incurable Optimist. He also had a primetime special of the same title in which he went around the world and studied people from different cultures and backgrounds, looking for the commonality of optimism….literally everywhere.

I know circumstances vary for individuals, and this is not to say that we should be happy all the time – or that adversity isn’t going to occur some in our lives – but happiness and an optimistic outlook really does make a difference in your overall well-being. It also is a gift that “keeps on giving” to others. Happiness is contagious!

Tomorrow when you get up in the morning, put a smile on your face…even if you are in pain or you just don’t think you can face the day. It should positively affect your family and that smile will break out on all of your faces before long.

Happiness is a choice that each one of us makes every day. I don’t know about you, but I would much rather be surrounded by two or three friends, co-workers or family members that displayed an overall positive attitude than to be surrounded by a room full of people who were displaying a negative attitude.

What if the world showed up for us in exactly the same way as we showed up to the world?

In other words, what if we start our day with thoughts of gratitude and only expected good things to happen. What if we see only the good in every person, and in every experience of the day? What if we see only the blessing in every situation?

How differently do you think the world would show up for us?

I’ve been experimenting with this concept and I’m convinced that the world will show up to match our expectations. 

Just in case I’m right…

…Instead of expecting everything to go wrong today, expect it to go right.

…Instead of cursing the things that aren’t perfect in your life, be grateful for the things that are.

…Instead of stumbling in the darkness, be the one to light a candle.

The world truly is a beautiful place, when we’re able to see it that way. Each day we’re given countless opportunities to show up for good. Don’t you think today would be a good day to try it and see what happens?

No matter what shows up on the outside, be positive.

No matter what others tell you, keep the faith.

No matter your bank balance, your marital status, or your weight, know that you are a child of the Universe, and abundant blessing are waiting for you. You deserve to be happy. 

All you have to do is show up with a grateful attitude and watch what happens. It seems so simple, when in truth, it actually is. :)

Thanks to Grzegorz for the awesome illustration! The e-card picture created by Grzegorz Łobiński for the EcardSphere project. 

I admit it. I’ve always considered myself a good listener. I was wrong. Not until I read Stephen Covey’s book, The 8th Habit, did I realize how limited my listening skills have been.

Perhaps my biggest mistake is trying to formulate a response while someone is still talking with me. Instead of giving my full attention to the speaker, I’m guilty of (1) allowing my mind to race ahead trying to solve a problem and (2) busy deciding if I agree (or not) with the one talking. In either scenario, I’m not fully engaged in what’s being said and therefore, I’m not listening effectively (and that has to change).

According to author Stephen Covey in his newest title, The 8th Habit: From Effectiveness to Greatness, communication is the most important skill in life. Covey writes that people spend about two-thirds of their time reading, writing, speaking or listening. There is one of these areas, however, that takes up between 40 and 50 percent of individuals’ time every day. Can you guess which area?

It is listening. Covey shares that most people “think” they know how to listen because they do it so much. But the truth is, the majority of us listen solely within our own frame of reference. This author explains that there are five levels of everyday listening beginning at the lowest level include:

1. Ignoring
2. Pretend listening (patronizing)
3. Selective listening
4. Attentive listening
5. Empathic listening

The first four areas in this continuum fall within one’s own frame of reference. Only the last, Empathic listening, does a person actually “transcend your own autobiography…out of your own history and judging tendencies, and get deeply into the frame of reference or viewpoint of another person.”

Covey underscores that the primary need to feel understood is like the body’s need for air in the lungs. Unless and until a person feels understood (and listened to), you will get no farther in communication with that individual.

Read on to learn Stephen Covey’s practical insights on how to further develop your ability to listen empathetically (and well).

• Be sincerely open to what others see and why they see the world as they do.
• People react to new information based on their previous experiences and personal history.
• There are always multiple ways to interpret information, keep this in the mental forefront of every conversation.
• Frequently, communication breaks down because of how people define the words spoken. However, when a spirit of empathy is present, true understanding heightens.

Bossing children around tends to produce resistance instead of cooperation. How does the thought of being managed by someone else make you feel? Irritated? Angry? Rebellious? If you’re like most, you react negatively to someone trying to boss or control you.

Your children are no different. They also do not like when you try to control their behavior. You can test this out by watching their reaction to commands like “Hurry up!”, “Stop fighting!” or “Quit your whining.”

The role of a parent is similar to being a boss, manager or leader. If you shy away from being the boss in your family and try instead to be your children’s friend, that leaves your family without the strong leadership it really needs.

Considering the Characteristics of Your Favorite Boss

I was recently at a conference where the audience was asked to think about their favorite boss or manager. The presenter then asked what qualities made this person such a good boss.

These are some of the important characteristics mentioned:

• Empathetic
• Honest
• Generous
• Passionate
• Consistent
• Fun
• Dynamic
• Positive attitude
• Inspirational
• Compassionate
• Trustworthy
• Sense of humor
• Fully present

The qualities of an excellent boss apply equally to parents. By developing these traits, you can become the admired leader in your family!

Becoming an Admired Leader Instead of a Despised Boss

If you’re a parent with children at home, then you are the leader. It’s up to you to be in charge of providing for the family, making the major decisions in the family and setting firm limits for your children. Families become dysfunctional when parents abandon their leadership role.

David recently told me in exasperation about how his 13-year-old son does “whatever he damn well pleases”. He sadly explained that he knew his son need stronger boundaries but was at a loss as to how effectively to influence his son’s behavior.

For example, his son recently came home two hours later than expected. Although he yelled at his son, the next day his son was late again. While yelling in anger is a natural response, it doesn’t match the characteristics of an excellent leader. What else could David have done?

He could have approached his son with honesty and empathy while also working towards a consistent solution. David might have explained, “I was really worried when you didn’t come home on time. I understand you were having fun and lost track of the time. How do you think we can change things so this doesn’t happen again?” Involving his son in figuring out the solution will increase the likelihood of his son sticking to their agreement.

Establishing Yourself as the Leader

It is certainly easier to influence a teen’s behavior if you’ve established yourself as the loving authority figure when the child was much younger. For example, if you tell a 3-year-old you will be leaving a friend’s house in 5 minutes and then when the time is up he puts up a fit, you can simply pick him up and take him home. If you tell a 13-year-old he needs to be home from a friend’s house in 5 minutes and he doesn’t want to leave, carrying him out isn’t an option!

Being able to consistently set limits is a fundamental skill you need to have as a parent. Your children will help you develop this skill by continually testing for where the limits are located!

Being Trustworthy

Another quality of exceptional leaders is being trustworthy. As a parent you gain your children’s trust when they know you will do what you say you will do. When you keep your promises, your children can count on you.

For example, if you’re at a pool and promise to catch your child if she goes down the slide, then be sure to catch her! One 50-year-old woman still gets angry telling about how her dad told her he would catch her and then didn’t.

Likewise, if you tell your child that you will be leaving the park if he throws rocks and he decides to throw rocks, you need to leave. By following through with consequences, your kids learn to trust your words.

Developing Your Leadership Qualities

Developing leadership qualities is a lifelong process. Think about the characteristics of your favorite leaders and decide which one you would most like to work on. The more you develop your leadership skills, the stronger your family will become.

In this holiday season of giving presents, let’s not forget the greatest present we can give to another person… that of the gift of being present. 

Recently I was in a coffee shop in San Francisco, watching a group of people seated at a table together, all texting on their phones, to someone else. Chances are that if they weren’t with the friends they were with in person, they would have been texting them too. Yet, they were together physically, but still focused elsewhere. What a lost opportunity to connect!

We’ve become addicted to being connected, to the extent that we’ve lost the personal connection with one another- especially in person.

Next time you’re in a public place, be aware of the people around you and look how many are with friends, yet busy surfing, texting or otherwise ignoring one another. Then go do something different. Be present with those that you are with.

It is a true gift when someone looks into your eyes and devotes their full attention to you when you are speaking. It shows that they are genuinely interested in what you have to share, and that they care about you. It feels good to give this kind of attention to a friend, and doubly good to receive it too.

This holiday season, watch your behavior and notice when you’re being present versus when you’re just there physically. Be aware of the impact that your behavior has on those around you. Realize that one of the best gifts that we can give to one another is the gift of our time, our attention and our presence. 

Photo credit: Astrogrl

Save some money in a “rainy day” fund. Organize your responsibilities each day. You want to have money to spend and a plan for your life- even a simple plan can make a difference.

Simplify. Get rid of the things we don’t need; don’t buy things you don’t need. There will be less to clean and less stuff that can get in our way.

Smile, even though things may not be perfect. This can make a big difference and contribute to overall peace in your life.

Single out the people in your life who mean the most to you. Tell them how much you care about them. Tell your kids or others in your life that you are proud of them. Tell your spouse or someone else who means a lot to you how much you love them.

If someone who means a lot to you needs encouragement, share some with them. Helping others brings us success. Intend to hold back negative thoughts as these can hold us back. We won’t take certain risks if negative thoughts are coming up into our minds.

Intend something that you never thought or believed to be possible. The first step is usually the hardest. Once we’re on the path to success, our life will be filled with happiness.

Are you ready to transform your life? Are you ready to open your arms and bring an abundance of joy, love, happiness, and success and material wealth into your life? Are you ready to start living the life you want, not the life you have? You can change the mental, emotional, spiritual and physical patterns that are keeping you stuck where you are and preventing you from being where you want to be. Find the secret to enjoying your life more fully no matter where you are in your journey.

My mother would have been 78 years old today, had she not passed away from a very unexpected, very sudden stroke nearly 6 months ago. She went from a healthy, vibrant, active senior, still working out daily and riding her bicycle many miles each week, to comatose within 15 minutes and passing away within a day. There was no warning and no time to say “Goodbye for now”.

Three generations of Goodwin women

We all know that  our parents will pass away. It’s all part of the circle of life and is nothing surprising- until it happens to us. Then, life as we know it changes forever. Suddenly, we too become mortal.

It’s been nearly 6 months since her passing, and yet, I still can’t remove her birthday from my calendar on my laptop. I think it will be on my calendar forever, not to remind me of the sadness of her passing, but to celebrate the life that she lived. Even though she is gone in a physical sense, I will still celebrate this special day of her birth.

In so many ways, she’s still here with me now. The values that she taught me, the memories that we created together, the conversations that were ours and ours alone….they will be with me forever.

I learned something valuable from my mother almost every time we were together, and her passing is nothing more than another opportunity to learn from her once again.

She taught me that love never dies, that we’ll always be together with those we love, and that life is indeed very short.  She reminded me that life is fleeting and can be gone for any of us in an instant. It’s not something to ever be taken for granted, but rather, something to be truly celebrated.

For that reason, be kind to one another. Never go to sleep angry with anyone. Don’t leave things unsaid that need to be said. Forgive one another and yourself. Love one another as if today could be your last.

So on this day, Happy Birthday Mom. In honor of your birthday, I’m going to plan a special day to celebrate your life by doing something on my bucket list, since you never got to finish yours. Perhaps I’ll be really crazy and go skydiving with my friend Adam, or maybe just go skiing, or hike in the snow at Glacier National Park. No matter what I do, know that you’ll be with me in my heart.

Happy Birthday Mom…. I love you.

Sometimes we make things way more complicated than they are. Every marketer tries to sell us a product that includes a promise to reverse the aging process. In truth, it would be much easier if these products worked. But since they don’t…we have to rely on doing things the old-fashioned way by implementing self-discipline and doing some lifestyle introspection.

Like most people, I love shortcuts…but with health and aging, they simply don’t work.

Here’s what does…in three simple steps.

There are several lifestyle changes that can result in improved health and positively affect the aging process. Promise. And this guarantee comes straight from a physician who specializes in helping people age strong.

Read Dr. Christopher Foetisch’s recommendations for reversing the aging process.

Simple as 1, 2, 3…

ONE: Weight loss is one of the most significant ways to peel off the years, not only will you obtain the cosmetic benefits of weight loss, but you will also receive many physical benefits. These include less stress on your joints and back, reduced risk of diabetes, improvement in blood pressure, increased mobility, and better sleep.

FOCUS POINT FOR CHANGE: Concentrate on lowering fat and sugar intake for fastest results.

TWO: Get seven to eight hours of sleep a night. Caution: too much sleep can have an adverse effect on overall health.

FOCUS POINT FOR CHANGE: clock in your nighttime sleep hours, but do not nap excessively during the day. Researchers from the California Pacific Medical Center Research Institute found that elderly white women who took a daily siesta were 44% more likely to die from any cause, 58% more prone to dying from heart problems, and nearly 60% more likely to die from non-cardiovascular or non-cancer causes. Those who napped less than three hours a week showed no increased chance of death.

THREE: Address your stress, as it is one of the biggest factors in premature aging. Stress causes the brain to produce chemicals that directly affect health negatively.

FOCUS POINT FOR CHANGE: Exercise several times a week to add muscle mass and strength and also gain improved cardiovascular health. A study of 9,611 adults in Medicine and Science in Sports and Exercise showed that those who were regularly active in their 50s and early 60s were about 35 percent less likely to die in the next eight years than those who were sedentary.

I am honored to be a part of the Million Moms Challenge, linking millions of moms to mothers in developing countries throughout the world. No matter what country we live in, what we do for a living or whether we are married or single, the one thing that is constant for mothers worldwide is our unconditional love for our children. We all want the best for our children and will do whatever we can do to make their world a better place.

As a part of the Million Moms Challenge, I was recently asked to share my best tip for raising healthy children. Although my children are now young adults, I still remember the words of a wise physician, as he spoke to my then 12-year-old daughter years ago. He gently explained to her that everything she was putting into her body was creating the 13-year-old she would become in the next year.

Each soft drink or sugary treat wouldn’t provide the nutrition needed to feed her hungry growing cells. This doctor explained that if she really wanted a strong, beautiful body with glowing skin, she needed to be wise with her choices each day. He helped her to understand the consequences and benefits of her decisions.

As I raised my children, I often thought of those wise words. Wanting to give my children the greatest advantage in life, I taught them how to eat healthy. I taught them the damages of smoking, drugs and artificial substances.  As I encouraged them to make wise choices, I helped them to understand that they were responsible for creating the kind of body they chose to have, not only in the next year, but for many years to come.

So many times kids feel powerless, as they have to listen to whatever their parents say, and feel as if they have little choice in many aspects of their lives. They’ll sneak things that are prohibited, just because they can.

By teaching my children about nutrition, they were empowered to make wise choices for themselves, knowing that their decisions today would impact their world tomorrow.  It wasn’t about what mom told they could or couldn’t do- they made smart choices that would affect their future, because they understood the benefits of good choices.

This gift has helped them grow into strong, healthy young adults. Now, as that information is passed on to my granddaughter, it will help her to do the same thing.

I believe the greatest gift we can give to our children is to instill the belief that they can achieve anything and the knowledge that they are loved.  Add to that the education to make wise nutritional choices that includes an abundance of fresh, organic fruits and veggies, and you have the recipe for healthy, happy children, both inside and out.

What’s your greatest tip to raise healthy children? By replying on the Millions Mom Challenge, you will be entered to win an exclusive Million Moms Challenge Gift Pack, which includes an iPad2, a custom-made Million Moms Challenge pendant and a $50 donation in your name to Global Giving.

Please show your support for the Million Moms Challenge by liking MMC on Facebook.

I look forward to reading your comments and thank you in advance for sharing your tips with all of us.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Million Moms Challenge. The opinions and text are all mine. Contest runs November 14 to December 18, 2011. A random winner will be announced by December 20, 2011.

Official Contest Rules

Photo Credit: DeusXFlorida

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

Does a person have to be happy all the time?

Can you expect there to be no negative experiences in your life? There will inevitably be negative events and experiences in life. It’s just the way things are – and things can happen in life that we never expected.

The loss of a loved one, the end of a marriage, a move to anew cityor country… the list of possibilities is endless. One person’s negative experience could be someone else’s positive. It also depends on how situations are dealt with.

Optimism contributes to a healthier, happier life. That doesn’t mean that there will never be negative things in life nor does it mean that someone has to be happy 24/7.

Happiness, like other things in life, is a choice. You can choose to be happy or unhappy, just as you can choose an outfit, how much money you spend, or what recreation you want to engage in. Choose happiness.

Reminding myself here… to be an advocate for those on both sides of the medical arena with my attitude and my actions.

With time at an all time premium, it only makes “cents” to learn the best ways to communicate with every physician’s office (for your sake and that of the office staff). Just about everyone has had at least one experience when they’ve felt frustrated waiting longer than they anticipated. This waiting too long can be felt in both in the scheduling department and the literal waiting room itself.

While everyone’s time is valuable, it appears that mutual understanding is not nearly so equitable. Patients grouse and complain about not getting their needs met fast enough. Physicians and their staff grow weary trying to explain and accommodate these same patients. Individuals from either position end the day exasperated and feeling misunderstood.

The remedy? Examine the cure-all (for every disagreeable bone in your body) listed below and see if they don’t cure what ails you in the attitude department.

When Scheduling Physician’s Appointments Always:

1. Be realistic

Society in general tries to cram 30 hours of work into a 24-hour day. Patients often schedule appointments on top of other appointments and then become frustrated if something gets thrown off track. (Always leave enough wiggle room.)

2. Don’t wait until the last-minute

People frequently wait until the last-minute to call for an appointment or prescription refill and then become frustrated when they are not accommodated accordingly. From an office standpoint, extenuating circumstances are understood. However, it is very frustrating when a patient calls the last-minute with a request that should/could have been addressed sooner.

3. Be understanding of others and their situations

It is difficult when someone is in pain or in a hurry to think of other people, but patients need to realize that doctors often run behind because they have had an emergency add-on or someone else needed a longer appointment. If patients would step back and understand that somebody else was in greater need on that particular day, it would ease tensions all around.

4. Communicate effectively

This goes both ways, for patients and office staff alike. People can get so much further if they just communicate in an effective manner. Common courtesy and honesty goes a long way (in the doctor/patient relationship as well as in life in general). Unfortunately, some patients think being difficult is what works.

While this may produce a desired immediate result, it is not worth the long-term compromising of one’s relationships and reputation as a reasonable patient.

Photo Credit: Ramsd

Just like the energy of a stream it is difficult to quantify the power of the stream until you put something in its way. Something in the way of a stream can be a waterwheel or a dam. If you put in a dam, then you are stopping and starting the flow. If you put in a waterwheel, to handle the energy of the stream, then you’re accentuating the energy of the stream.

The same energetic principles apply to marketing. Marketing is somewhat difficult to quantify but it is a basic necessity of any business. If you think you can survive without marketing or the energy placed behind marketing, then you are stopping the energy of flow into your business.

Think about energy and marketing as what you have to share with the world. If you are constantly out there and present in some way, whether it is via referrals, networking, social media networking or the print, blog or television media then you are creating the opportunity for flow. If you are not doing one or any of these, then the flow is either very slow or it is non-existent.

One other aspect of energy and marketing is the flow that you are in personally. This is the very thing that makes something go viral when there seems to be no rhyme or reason. This is the unseen and subtle energy that comes from faith, meditation, clarity, inner resolve, certainty etc. that makes things go that much more easily.

One of the ways that I love to market is through my daily meditation practice, and one of the ways that I’ve helped my clients grow their businesses is through the Learn to Meditate in 2 Minutes process on which I wrote a book. This is the most cost effective methodology of gaining the energy to and for marketing.

The times are strange and out of joint. It’s in the air. We can sense with disquiet that the balance of things is shifting. Even the weather seems disordered and in flux. The old order is faltering, and we look at the world around us with alarm and confusion. Many of us feel weary and overwhelmed, unsure of how to cope with everything that’s happening.

Often the path to positive change comes through a crisis. When our lives are spinning out of control, we finally pay attention. While no one wants to endure these hardships, if we use this time as one of learning and awaken to the clear realization of what’s truly important in life, maybe we can get back on track.

I believe that it’s critically important for us to change our perspective in order to see the world and ourselves in a new light. The practice of self-reflection allows us to gain insight into our own lives and enables us to lean into this time of upheaval. Some of us are even finding ways to embrace it. We’ve come to be grateful for the challenge, seeing it as an opportunity for growth, acquiring new skills and developing new talents. We’ve begun, in fact, to live life like it’s a momentous occasion of wonder.

Ask yourself this question: what do I believe? Have your beliefs allowed you to acquire a positive view of the world and your place in it? Or, are your beliefs rooted in negative thoughts that hold you back from real happiness? If the latter is true for you, you’re not alone.

Over a lifetime, we accumulate memories and experiences that can do one of two things. They can be a comfort to us and propel us on in this life with hope or they can hold us back and prevent us from achieving true contentment. It’s not easy to redefine what we believe. The very act brings into question all we think, feel, and are. But if we don’t pause and reflect on our beliefs at regular intervals throughout our lives, we can lose perspective – and peace of mind.

All it requires is a little time and the willingness to look at who we are, where we’ve come from, and how we wish to move forward. The secret is to believe in our potential, to be fearless about discarding the old, limiting beliefs that imprison our minds and to hang on to the beliefs that empower us and set us free.

When I work with clients, we uncover their particular belief systems. Our prevailing beliefs or what we refer to as “mental models” are there, waiting to have light shed upon them. Only by examining them, fully understanding their impact and becoming conscious of how our belief systems affect our behavior, do we have any real chance to change them. And yes, we can change them. Once we come to understand the impact of limiting beliefs, it is easier to change them – and be free to walk with buoyant steps as we proceed on our life’s journey.

In my new book KENSHO: A Modern Awakening, Instigating Change in an Era of Global Renewal, I present some of the many ways to incite positive change and the myriad reasons for harnessing optimism. I’m thrilled to have unearthed the stories of some of the many remarkable people around us today who awaken us with their transformative vision.

Now it’s your turn… I want to hear your stories. Do you have an inspirational story of change and transformation? What was the pivotal point that led you to shift a limiting belief? Let us know at steinbrecher.com and enter our “Awakenings Contest” for a chance to win a weekend stay in a Presidential Suite at the Gaylord Texan Resort and Convention Center – plus plenty of other great prizes from the esteemed experts that are featured in Kensho: A Modern Awakening.

My sincerest wish is that you may be inspired to discover what is at the heart of Kensho: a joyful awakening to the interconnectedness of all beings in the world and the marvels that lie within our very selves.

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

How many decisions do you make in a day?

From fast food, to text meetings to tweets that blow up our phone we are inundated with media. Compounding that, we live in a world full of choices – more so than any other time in history. From our hairspray to our hamburgers, it seems that the more we seek the more choices we have.

Choices can empower us and choices can overwhelm us. In our instant gratification society, where the choices come fast and furious, where do we begin in making the choices that impact our daily lives?

I would like to offer to you the notion that sometimes choice is best served by choosing to do nothing. There are days that seemingly never end and for those days I choose rest. Yes, you heard me, I choose rest. I shut off the computers and the TV. I unplug my kids from their iPods and their Playstations. I close the curtains on the chilly day, build a fire and I rest. My kids rest with me. And for a few precious hours we are just in a state of being.

No music. No TV. No books to read. No talking. When this happens, I find that we all end up on one couch under one blanket.  One family resting. It’s at these still moments that I feel the energy of my family. I feel the love that binds us. It doesn’t last long as the bickering soon begins between my kids, but for that brief moment in time when all is quiet, our bodies recharge.

Soon we are back to our baseball, riding lessons, and trumpet recitals lives and the days pass in a blur. But from time to time, one of my secrets to happiness is to stop. Choose to do nothing and in it you begin to find everything you need.

On October 10th, 2010, at 10 a.m., I took a positive step forward on the journey towards biodiversity. I walked as a POWER (Protect Our Water and Environmental Resources) Youth Caucus volunteer for the Halton Hills Trek to bring awareness to climate change on 10/10/10, which is a global day of action on the 10th day, 10th month and on the 10th year of the second millennium. This initiative was organized by the Sustainable Halton Hills and POWER.

Harnoor volunteering at POWER Youth Caucus

When I look back from 10/10/10 to 10/10/11, I feel proud of myself for the steps I have taken towards positive changes in biodiversity. Here are some of the actions I have taken:

On May 22, 2011, I spent the day at Georgetown Marketplace Mall celebrating the International Day for Biological Diversity. It was a fun and amazing experience. I asked people to sign a petition to support valuable species and biodiversity and also to stop the Quarry from damaging the environment. I handed out baby red pine trees in little environmentally-friendly pouches because they were made out of recycled paper. I also gave children activity books which had 52 actions everyone can do to help the environment. Some of the 52 actions in that booklet included turning your lights off when you are done with them, following the three R’s: reduce, reuse, and recycle, and turning the tap off when it’s not in use.

For those who did not want to sign the petition, I offered them buttons, calendars, and educational brochures that described Canada’s natural forests and biodiversity. I also gave out some youth caucus membership slips for those interested in joining the group and helping the environment.

Teachers were interested in the educational material designed to promote “green actions” in their schools and to discuss these actions with their “green team.” One green action was putting up little signs indicating what does and does not go in the garbage and recycling bin, which would be a tremendous action to boost one’s school’s eco level. Teachers can also have prizes to give away to classes that have the least garbage at the end of the week. These are just some types of green actions that can be done at one’s school.

I volunteer for POWER Halton and Willow Park Ecology Centre. Both groups, like most environmental groups, are always looking for volunteers to help with their organizations. You can volunteer too! It is very rewarding to know you are making a positive change and supporting the environment.  Make your community greener by joining local environmental groups and making small changes in your own life!

Harnoor is a young volunteer and activist. View his profile on InspireMeToday.com for more information.

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

Are high-achievers happier than the rest of the population? Is there a relationship between goal achievement and happiness?

Curiously, there are people who have achieved great things in life but aren’t necessarily happy. Conversely, there are those who have achieved very little by today’s standards yet seem to be quite content.

This is a question worthy of contemplation. An ever broader question pertains to the concept of one’s purpose beyond the concept of goal achievement. If we feel we have a purpose in life, are we happier? If our existence serves others, do we experience a greater degree of happiness? And if this is so, should we be rethinking and redefining our goals and our purpose in life?

It seems that one question begs another. We need to sort this matter out. Indeed, our happiness depends on it.

This leads us to search within ourselves to find our own personal brand of happiness. When we are busily achieving our goals or serving a purpose, we feel energized and engaged. But once we have met our goals and fulfilled our purpose, what then? Are we satisfied?  Have we found that deep sense of lasting contentment? Or do we then go about setting new goals or seeking a new purpose?

It appears that our happiness may be conditional upon our choices and activities. Happiness, in this case, is based on external circumstances. However, quite possibly, happiness comes from a different place altogether. And the answer may surprise you. As with all things in life, we have a choice.

As we go through our daily lives we sometimes forget the importance of the people who have impacted our lives. These people have helped us learn and grow into the person we have become.

Sometimes we get stuck in deep ego thoughts about making decisions and worry about what “I” (me) will get out of it.

One of the main purposes in life is to experience our soul’s mission with others. Each soul that comes into our life helps us learn why we are truly here. It is through our experiences and interactions that we “remember” why we came into this life and what we are meant to achieve while in our human form.

For many years, I have studied the connection between the ego and the higherself. In this time I have found a simple and easy way to make decisions easy and less frightening. This quick process has positive outcomes and keeps us balanced on an everyday basis. I feel that it is time to share my little secret as it has guided me to the wonderful life I live today.

Listed below are the three questions I ask myself before making a decision:

• Am I about to take this action for my own benefit? (Whether the answer is yes or no, don’t do it!)
• Am I about to take this action for the benefit of someone else? (Whether the answer is yes or no, don’t do it!)
• Am I about to take this action for the benefit of all? (If the answer is yes, then do it! It is only when you equally value yourself as an individual, and the larger whole of the community, that your three selves are in balance and you are acting according to your purpose and authentic self.)

This process works in any area of your life. You will feel more comfortable with day-to- day decisions along with large decisions. This automatically gets you thinking in the “WE” rather than the “Me”.

Photo Credit: Max Elman

As I’ve personally benefited from these professionals… thought you might like to know more about who they are and what they do (for you).

The Physician’s Assistant: chances are your doctor has one. If he doesn’t, then a colleague of his certainly does. Eventually, you’re going to come face to face with one, but if you’re not sure whom you’re dealing with, there could be confusion, frustration, and some irritation tossed in for good measure. So what’s this illusive, often-misunderstand and occasionally maligned medical mystery component? It is your doctor’s new best friend. It is his colleague, trusted confidante and loyal partner. In short, it’s his PA (physician’s assistant).

Sweeping across the country as the fourth fastest growing career is the physician’s assistant and if your physician or specialist doesn’t have one yet, he soon will. These skilled individuals contribute to excellence in patient care in multi-faceted ways by shortening patient wait time, ordering diagnostic tests, performing therapeutic procedures, instructing and counseling patients, and sometimes prescribing medicines with their physician’s approval. In sum, a physician’s assistant makes everyone’s life better.

Not convinced? Consider this all too familiar scenario. You injure yourself and the dreaded trip to the local emergency room is required. Once you’ve been evaluated by the attending doctor and the appropriate protocol has been followed for your particular case, tests are run, x-rays taken, and medicines prescribed. You’re now handed the release forms with instructions to make a follow-up (or for further treatment) appointment with your own physician within the next few days.

No problem, so far. That is, until you try to get that coveted time slot within your slim timeframe. Frequently, patients requiring quick follow-up care end up waiting much longer than is recommended, even after being instructed by the medical professionals by whom they’ve just been treated.

Sadly, scheduling backup doesn’t limit itself to the currently ill or newly injured; it’s just as widespread for the bulk of patients seeking appointments for their regular check-ups as well. Waiting an additional month or two for an annual check-up is now commonplace; yet it is not nearly so frustrating or risk-ridden as when the need to be seen by a physician is urgent and ordered by another health care professional for optimizing the healing process. Therein lies the beauty of the physician assistant’s service to patients needing either preventative or palliative care.

If and when you are placed in the position of needing immediate, non-emergency care (and one day, you will be), your most advantageous edge at getting the promptest care may well come through your physician’s trusted PA.

From the every vantage point, it only makes sense for doctors to co-labor with a physician’s assistant as their job function is both comprehensive and complementary in easing the burdensome workload of the physician as well as that of the staff. Physician’s assistants likewise communicate with respective coordinating hospital and secondary technical facilities to provide faster care to those initially skeptical, but eventually won over, highly satisfied and grateful patients.

Specifically, what does a PA offer? Perhaps first and foremost in every patient’s mind is the speed to which they are able to get an appointment. Timeliness and flexibility in patient scheduling is a primary benefit. Says Dr. Christopher A. Foetisch, orthopedic surgeon at the Toledo Clinic, “When my PA is out of town, we schedule about fifteen less patients per day.”

Additionally, given that Dr. Foetisch is only in his office two days a week, his patients are able to secure prompt care through his PA who offers faster admittance to this practice’s expertise. Once in the office, patients can then be confident that the PA has access to all tests, x-rays, and prescribed medicines as well as any other pertinent medical information. The PA also confers with the doctor on the primary care plan while getting initial treatment started sooner.

So why then, after considering the above clear benefit to all concerned, do some physicians’ assistants run into initial resistance from patients? Sadly, a few patients react with a certain measure of skepticism when their doctor’s PA enters the room. Why? From a purely practical standpoint, people don’t like repeating themselves and after the nurse completes her brief survey of questions the very next person a hurting patient longs to see is his physician. But as Dr. Foetisch points out, “Patients should look at the PA as the door and not the barrier to seeing the doctor.”

Another more subtle bias that PA’s must overcome arises from the patient’s desire to be attended by someone he has built rapport and over time, trust. Most individuals select their doctors by word of mouth from someone they trust and respect. Thus, in a very real sense patients invest in their choice of doctor by way of making themselves vulnerable and open to personal questions as they subjugate themselves to his medical judgment. Once established, patients very understandably prefer their own doctor’s care to anyone else’s.

And yet as the general public becomes better educated on how PA’s bring greater immediate and long-term benefits to their overall healthcare experience, they will begin thanking them for their input and expertise and welcoming their contributory role to their overall health care process. As Dr. Foetisch notes, “The reality is that there is a physician shortage and physician extenders are going to be more and more commonplace.”

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

Are you stuck? Are you waiting for the right things to happen so that you can finally be happy?

For many people, happiness is an enigma. Happy comes and goes, yet it is not something that is a constant in life. Yet it is possible for happiness to be one of the most dependable elements of your life.

When we get trapped in the little boxes we create for ourselves, we find ourselves feeling miserable, lost and alone. Maybe we think we need a new job. Maybe we think we need a new partner or more money. Maybe we think we need more time off from work or a nice vacation.

The list of “maybes” can become quite long. Maybe we should stop thinking so much. Maybe we should just make a decision. Just maybe, happiness is a choice.

Have you ever considered that your happiness, or your H-Factor, is a choice or a simple decision you make regardless of the circumstances of your life?

The interesting thing that happens when we surrender to happiness is that the doors around us start to open. Rather than finding ourselves trapped with now way out, solutions seem to appear and new opportunities find their way to us. We begin to see life very differently. Once we make the choice for happiness, we then take the steps that lead us forward on our journey.

Ultimately, choosing happiness will catalyze a chain reaction of new and exciting experiences.

I like to travel. I like to anticipate what I’ll experience when I arrive.

New places. New people. New tastes, sights, and smells.

Love the whole “new” experience.

I also like to ensure I’ll be healthy wherever my foot steps…and that takes a special kind of planning.

Any trip takes a good amount of preparation, but there’s an equally important pre-trip planning that should take place before every trip we take — and that’s planning to travel healthy.

If you’re not sure what that type of planning looks like, read on for specific recommendations offered by a physician who understands how making wise medical decisions while on vacation is just part of taking care of yourself (and your family).

Dr. Christopher A. Foetisch, Toledo orthopedic surgeon writes —

When planning a trip away from home, the last thing a vacationer wants to contemplate is the possibility of becoming ill while away. By making a few in advance preparations, anyone can help to ensure their vacation will be optimally healthy and safe. Read below to be certain you’ve prepared a wellness “check list” for travels in the States and overseas.

Before you go:

• Take a list of all medications and known allergies.

• Include your primary care physician and pharmacy phone numbers.

• Keep all medications packed in your carry-on, not in checked luggage.

• If traveling for an extended time, be sure to bring a refill.

During travel:

• If you or a family member becomes ill, contact the hotel concierge or someone you know locally to find out where to go for medical care.

• A referral increases the odds of getting optimal treatment. Don’t simply go to the nearest (or most convenient) clinic or urgent care facility.

Special considerations:

• Those individuals prone to illness should consider travel health insurance before leaving.

• Medical evacuation insurance is particularly helpful for overseas travel and can be purchased for a reasonable fee.

• Refer to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention travel site for specific information/warnings regarding the country you are intending to visit.

Final Word:

Despite what we read in the news, the United States does have the best medical care in the world. So given the option, do your best to get back home to be treated. As the old saying goes, “There is no place like home” truly applies to health care.

The greatest gifts, the most meaningful lessons and the most intense personal growth in my life, have come from the conscious practice of gratitude. I’ve found that no matter where I am in life or where I want to be, the fastest way to get there is with an attitude of gratitude.

There is always a reason to be grateful, for when we appreciate and celebrate what we already have in our lives, our hearts open, our blessings multiply and we discover a greater capacity for generosity, cheerfulness, and contentment.

A few years ago I had an experience that demonstrates the overwhelming power of gratitude.  I was part of a small group that gathered to assemble and distribute  “goodie bags” to the needy people living in the park in Santa Monica, California.

Our group met at a local shelter to fill bags with a toothbrush, toothpaste, warm socks, deodorant, a razor and other necessities. We were putting the items into bags, when a young homeless man in his 20′s walked into the room.

Thinking that he was being impatient and was there to pick up a bag, one of the men asked him to please wait outside with the others. Instead, he told us that his name was Josh, and that he wanted to help.

Surprised and somewhat ashamed of ourselves, we quickly welcomed him. As we worked side by side, he proceeded to share that he’d been homeless for a few months. Just the night before, he’d been beaten and robbed of his last few dollars, his coat, his glasses and his shoes.

His came into the shelter not to ask for help, but rather, to offer his assistance. Josh told us that no matter what happened to him, he was grateful that he still had two hands that were willing to serve his brothers and sisters on the street.

We were humbled by Josh’s compassion and most of all, by his profound sense of gratitude. For most of us, being homeless was about the worst thing that we could imagine. Yet, here was a man that was not only homeless but had also been beaten up and robbed- and all he wanted, was to express his gratitude to us and be of service to his friends.

Somehow all of my “problems” disappeared. My perspective changed from worrying about the things I don’t yet have in my life, to extreme gratitude for what I do.  I went to that shelter to give, but I was the one who received. I left with the greatest possible gift- a tangible reminder of the power of gratitude.

Josh reminded me that regardless of my personal circumstances, each day I am given a choice. I can choose to wake up worried about the drama of life, or I can consciously shift my energy and perception and count my blessings. It’s impossible to focus on both at the same time.

The volunteers were so impressed and humbled by Josh, that after working with us for the afternoon, Josh left with shoes, a coat, a cell phone, a place to stay and even a job offer. The amazing thing is, all of this came from Josh being grateful for what little he had.

Gratitude helps us find the blessing, even in difficult situations or circumstances. When we feel gratitude deep within our souls, we grow as a person, the world is a brighter place, our attitude is uplifted, and anything seems possible.

Gratitude increases our connection to one another and to God, helps us see a greater bounty of blessing in our life, and creates even more things to be grateful for. Gratitude is the fastest way to move from where we are to where we want to be.

When one intentionally expresses gratitude at the beginning and the end of each day, we not only grow as individuals, but also, the world is indeed a very blessed place.

I’m curious to know: What has inspired you to grow as a person? By replying you will be entered to win one of two prizes! First Prize: $150 to a Local Spa, plus $50 Gift Certificate to the CerraBoutique. Second Prize: One of Five $100 Gift Certificate to the CerraBoutique.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Cerra. The opinions and text are all mine. Official Contest Rules.

Photo Credit: Max Elman

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

Focusing on now means that you focus on what is happening in the present. You can’t change what happened yesterday and you don’t know what tomorrow will bring so focus on what is happening right now. Focusing on now means that you focus on what is happening in the present. You can’t change what happened yesterday and you don’t know what tomorrow will bring so focus on what is happening right now.

Remember too that you can’t fix what happened yesterday and you can’t fix anything that may happen tomorrow. It’s all about now- you can fix everything right now. The things that happened yesterday and what is yet going to happen tomorrow can’t be changed. It’s all about focusing on the present.

If you are focusing on the past, including past mistakes or past hurts, you are going to bring lots of negative feelings to the present. What about your future? If you are looking at things you’d like to accomplish someday, then you are missing out on the joy of the present and all the moments you can experience right now!

To stay focused on now, think of the following statements:

• What you can do now.
• What you can say now.
• How you are feeling right now.
• What you want to happen in your life now.
• What you believe now.

Remember that this all starts with you! You can choose to focus on the present and bring happiness into your life. It can be as easy as you want it to be.

For the past several months I’ve been hearing from clients that they are exhausted. They aren’t feeling like they are motivated to do anything. All they want to do is get through the day and go to bed. One of the things they say is that their brains are feeling mucky and thick.

Could it be that summer had been pressing on everyone so much so that they cannot get enough rest when sleeping? Or it may be that the time change is afflicting everyone in a different way than usual. Maybe it could be that they are just deprived of oxygen. It may be they have something going on inside their bodies that is interrupting their sleep cycle. Maybe the stars and moon are misaligned?

Really it could be all of those things, but first and foremost if you are not getting enough rest while sleeping then your body will feel exhausted.

Our bodies need oxygen more than ever to counteract the imbalances of the electrical impulses that surround us. The brain deprived of oxygen creates a headache. It is just the same with the body. One of the first things in a sequence that can create crabbiness is the body is deficient of oxygen. It goes on from there that the body deprived of water, healthy live food, and rest will make it send excessive adrenaline into the system. Constant adrenaline running through the system is like an electrical charge that won’t stop.

Blood pressure rises due to constant adrenaline and can create the inability to get enough rest or even sleep. To get the blood pressure regulated, the body and brain must know or re-learn how to rest. Because most people live in flight or fight the body often forgets how to rest.

One of the best and simplest solutions I’ve discovered to remedy this is to utilize first your breath and second your hands and eyes. Through the rest of our eyes we can actually allow the entire body to respond to rest. If you will think of getting a massage and the therapist has placed a soft pillow over your eyes during the session this technique is similar.

Your breath is necessary to allow the release of negative energies, thoughts, programs, patterns and attitudes. With your lungs you are giving rest to your body and brain. With your breath into the lower abdomen, middle chest then upper chest and reverse you are resting your organs, which supply the needed balance to the brain.

Every night you need to realize that your energy has deposited on your bed. That energy you’ve deposited permeates the entire room and furniture of the room that you sleep in. When you clear out the energy from the previous night you are that much more able to sleep. One way I do this is to use my special clearing spray. This spray has brought many a good night’s sleep and rest to the body and the lungs ultimately bringing about rest to the entire physical body and restoring balance.

My daughter was born 30 years ago and I can still remember the first moment that I held her, as if it were yesterday. After 28 hours of labor I was thrilled for the process of childbirth to be complete, but I was in awe at the beauty of this tiny life. When she was placed into my arms I remember the rush of things that went through my mind, from overflowing gratitude, to how will I know what to do to take care of this precious child? I remember staring at her for hours then falling asleep while gazing into her eyes, holding her close…. Continue reading on the Million Moms Challenge site.

Photo Credit: Dave Stokes

When it happens to someone you love everything changes.

Several weeks ago, a very dear friend (one of those friends who can finish your thoughts or your sentences for you friends) found out she has cancer.

Breast cancer.

In all honesty, I didn’t know what to think. What to feel.

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

Before you think of Cinderella and the three fairy godmothers, I want you to think about how many times you think about what you want or what you wish for. I want, I wish, and only if are some of the phrases we use to describe an ambiguous point in our future when we will have what we think we need to be happy. In the present moment, we are left feeling unfulfilled.

We are living with a sense of longing for a brighter future. We are hoping to change our current situation so that we can finally, finally be happy. And what are the things we need to be happy? A relationship? A new home? A new car? A new job? There are many, many requirements we have for happiness.

How long are we going to wait until we decide that we are happy whether or not our life changes to meet our expectations? Quite possibly our expectations are blocking the road to happiness. After all, we can be happy right here and right now if we choose it.

Our H-Factor, or our happiness factor, is not dependent on external circumstances. We live in a material world where success and status is measured by the quantity of material possessions we acquire, and this persuades us to believe that we will find happiness through acquisition of possessions. We spend many years of our lives acquiring the things we think will bring us happiness.

Of course, there can be great enjoyment and pleasure in material belongings, but beneath it all, this is not the source of our happiness. Our happiness comes from a deep and untouchable place within us. When we stop seeking the answer to our happiness from the outside world, we realize that happiness is a state of being that exists within us.

All we need to do to find nirvana is make a choice.  We can choose to be happy.  We ultimately find our happiness within the inner sanctum of ourselves.

Is it really that simple? Yes.

Your doctor wants to see you happy and from the moment you enter an exam room, the attention is centered on you as the patient. Your physician takes notes of your symptoms, your pain, and every medical reason for being in his office. As he listens, your doctor is also making mental notes on how to best diagnose and then treat your condition. He is developing a plan of action scripted just for you. It’s his job to help you get better and he’s happy to take on the role of caregiver.

What physicians aren’t happy about is when their patients ask for the impossible without taking personal responsibility to follow the step-by-step guidelines offered them.

It’s good to remember that once a doctor shares his recommendations and you come to an agreement, an essential exchange takes place. The responsibility has now shifted heavily toward you as the patient. When any individual seeks out medical assistance, the implication is that the sick person recognizes his need for expertise and intervention found solely through the insights and skills offered by a physician. However, what’s not so clearly stated is that the primary job of every patient is to see to it that he heeds the instructions given him by his health care provider.

We all have a tendency to look for shortcuts – easy solutions. We think life will be perfect if we lose 20 pounds, have a face lift, get a better job, find the person of our dreams . . . (fill in the blank). We put too much faith in passing fads that offer unrealistic guarantees—we will feel better, look younger, and have more than what we have right now.

While there is no magic elixir that guarantees eternal health, happiness, and youthfulness, there are many important tools that can radically change our entire concept of aging.

Fact is, aging is not about chronology; it’s about biology.

You can start growing younger tomorrow. The keys to feeling and staying young are within our grasp.

We need to be vigilant in how we protect ourselves and support our health. Environmental toxins alter our DNA. They damage our immune systems. They increase our predisposition to illness and disease. This means to avoid the foods, toxins, and even the people who sap our strength and distract us from our true potential and purpose in life.

Nature has provided us with a bounty of nutrient-rich foods that give us the minerals, vitamins, and antioxidants we need to be beautiful, strong, and living longer. By adding probiotics and fermented foods to our diets, we can ensure that these wonderful nutrients do not just end up as waste, but are assimilated and used by our bodies in the best possible way. There are cutting-edge supplements that turn the table on the aging process and will one day be mainstream.

And there are other choices that we can make right away to positively impact the quality of our lives.

We must get the RIGHT type of exercise. The right type of exercise keeps us fit and strong, improves our ability to fight off disease, helps us to cleanse away toxins, stabilizes our mood, and builds bone density and lean muscle. The problem is most people are not doing the right type of exercising. That’s one thing we need to change in the culture. People are actually aging their bodies with much of the exercise they are doing.

We must reduce stress and balance our hormones. Stress has been linked to nearly every disease we know and it cuts years off our lives. We need to slow down, worry less, relax more. We need to simplify, and that means not just getting rid of stuff, but de-cluttering our lives so that we focus on the things that really matter. There are so many techniques to actually open the doors to better brain wave optimization and energy flow in the body.

In fact, Nature has always been on our side, giving us the unique ability to self-cleanse—to get rid of the waste, impurities and toxins that compromise our health and cause disease. We have to change our approach, focus on the right foods and simple techniques to build energy, cleanse toxins, correct digestion, and conquer infection.

At 65, I look and feel better than I did in my 40s. People always assume the worst if you look and feel young. That is something we have to change as a culture.

We all make choices every day whether to build or deplete our energy, whether to treasure or wound the bodies that have been entrusted to us. Let’s start making those good choices today.

After years of research, Donna has compiled the most cutting-edge anti-aging knowledge that will change your life. The Baby Boomer Diet: Anti-Aging Wisdom For Every Generation and the companion Growing Younger audio/video series is a fascinating blend of break-through medical information, practical health advice, and spiritual wisdom relevant for people of any age. It juxtapositions today’s stress filled lifestyle with practical guidelines rooted in ancient principles. Change your life now!

Photo Credit: Adria Richards

By Lisa Cypers Kamen.

Here are a couple of self-reflection questions and secrets to a happy life.

Ask: If I had one day left, would I forgive the person who hurt me most? Could I do so without demanding any form of punishment? Who are the people in your life who deserve your forgiveness? You will be surprised how wonderful you feel when you forgive – you may feel free.

Miracles happen every day, when we least expect them. Have the belief that they can happen for you.

Your value isn’t determined by the amount of money you make or the clothes you wear but by the lives you have touched, the relationships you have and cultivate and by the kind of person you are. Realize the importance of those intangible things in your life: love, compassion, friendship and passion.

Ask: If this were my last day, how would I choose to spend it? Where would I go? What would I hope to see? Would I offer anyone an apology or seek forgiveness from them? What music would be the soundtrack of my final day? What is my life purpose and legacy? What is my perfect day? Go and live your life as if it were your last day. Do it now,

Hopefully this has guided your reflection and thinking as you live your life day-to-day. Self-reflection can have a powerful impact. Keep looking for those things that make you happy every day!

If you know me, you know I value sleep. Good sleep. Every night. No exception. Everyone has a weakness and mine is being able to rest soundly night after night…and when obstacles such as (my loose shoulder) keep me tossing and turning throughout the nighttime hours my mind can wander…and lately it’s been wandering back to a trip I took with my good friend, Mary. She’s going back to Europe soon. I am not. Sadness. But, I can reminisce about our two wonderful trips together and dream.

Here’s one snapshot of our travels….and how we learned to get a good night’s sleep far, far away.

On a recent dream trip to Florence, Italy, my close friend and I were treated to daily half day long art history lectures by a college professor whose passion for the topic of art is unparalleled. His enthusiastic talks left us both inspired and mentally exhausted. We’d then walk the streets of this ancient, yet so modern city, until we were worn out and so ready for a good night’s sleep. Back to the “self-help” hotel (as we lovingly dubbed this understaffed, yet pricey establishment) we’d wearily trek. Unlocking our door, we were surprised to find our room, not being cleaned, but used as the cleaning staff’s late afternoon gathering spot for watching Italian soap operas (on the edge of my bed, no less).

Though our room was aesthetically restful in appearance, it was frequently missing those bedtime ritual items such as toilet tissue, bath soap, pillows and blankets. Often, we didn’t notice until we were ready for bed. My friend and I similarly assumed that other hotel guests (and their crying babies) would be courteous enough to stay within the confines of their particular hotel room…not walking down the hall outside of ours all night long. Cultures are different and sometimes these differences can make the difference between enjoying sweet slumber or not.

We quickly discovered that if we needed something, we had to get it ourselves…and that revelation included making practical preparations for enjoying a good night’s sleep.

Given our rigorous daytime schedule, you’d think we would sleep deeply, soundly, and without interruption after having walked ten-plus miles during the day. But, sadly, we didn’t…even though our bodies cried out for rest and a rejuvenating night’s sleep…we didn’t rest well (and on some nights…hardly at all). Why? We didn’t prepare in advance. We took for granted that given how physically and mentally exhausting our daytime schedule was, we would plunk our heads on our pillows and be out within minutes. First mistake.

Sleeping in an unfamiliar hotel room (in this country as well as abroad) realistically requires as much advance preparation, as does the planning for one’s active daytime hours. As Dr. Christopher A. Foetisch, an orthopedic surgeon from Toledo, OH, observes, “It is best to keep to the same sleeping schedule when traveling as at home. Even when traveling from one U.S. time zone to another, try to go to bed around the same time even if it means getting to bed ‘early’ for that particular part of the country.” Attempting to stay up extra late or get up extra early to “get yourself used to” another sleep schedule usually does more harm than good, unless you are traveling overseas where the time difference is significant.

Our second mistake was making assumptions about how quickly we’d adapt to such unfamiliar sleeping conditions. Neither of us was used to sleeping with the other (me being the morning person and my friend being the night owl) and adjusting to opposite sleeping schedules and personal bedtime routines was tricky at best.

After several consecutive nights’ lack of sleep, we, in bleary-eyed fashion, realized we needed to apply some forethought (and fast) to the upcoming evening’s respite of sleep. Otherwise, we’d end up even more emotionally and physically frazzled. After a strong cup of morning espresso, my friend and I planned wisely. We’d duplicate our normal at-home sleeping environment as much as we were able…and give it a trial run.

If it didn’t work, we’d continue to make alterations until we achieved our ultimate goal: sleeping until the “self-help” hotel staff awoke us with their morning wake-up call. By the week’s end, we had our routine down pat…just in time to head to the airport for home. (And did we ever sleep on the eight-hour airplane trip home, pure bliss.

Tips for sleeping soundly away from home.

• Request a non-smoking room located as far away from the elevators and ice machines as possible.
• If you are traveling with a friend, make sure the room has two double beds.
• Consider investing in the cost of a private room for maximum quietness and personal down time.
• Bring your own pillow from home.
• Purchase earplugs if you are used to “white” noise at home to help block out sounds from the hallway or by a roommate’s movements.
• Consider using an over the counter or prescription sleep aid as needed.
• Unwind before trying to sleep, transition slowly from the day’s activity to night’s slumber. Read the Psalms, listen to soothing music, and spend time in prayer.

By Dr. Murray Grossan.

In Stressed? Anxiety? Your Cure is in the Mirror I speak of time travel for health and relaxation.

What works is to relax, then recall using five senses – smell, taste, feel, sight, sound and joy. When you do this properly, your body chemistry changes, sometimes significantly. If you recall that happy 18th birthday, maybe you will have a similar chemistry that you did then.

You can monitor this effect. Your blood pressure may change. Your pulse rate may change. Your white count may change too as well as your blood sugar.

As a medical student we gave one person a ‘fake” glucose test, as though they were ingesting lots of glucose. Then we measured the blood. They had the same response to the fake glucose that people get with the real one!

There are so many applications for this time travel with joy.

You have a pain from a mild injury. It hurts. Now visualize a fun experience before the injury. Some persons really benefit from this.

What I hope is that this will encourage researchers to try this on autoimmune diseases. Something –we don’t really know what—causes the immune factors of the body to attack normal body tissue. What was that trigger? Can we turn off that trigger? At this point, no one really knows, but it is certainly a field to explore.

For my patients I have had nice results with future time travel. For illness not responding well, I ask them to visualize going into a time travel device, coming out in the future and all the advanced methods, unknown today, are used to cure them . As detailed in my book, they see colored lights shine on them, they drink strange tasting concoctions, they hear and sense strange vibrations. There are pleasant smells. They feel warm baths and bubbles.

This too is a field I hope others will experiment with.

Although this sounds amazingly simple and easy to try, it requires practice. You need full relaxation and visualization and repetition to make this work. It is well worth the effort so you can achieve better health.

Photo Credit: Janet Ramsden

Every day when we turn on the news, we see a world that seems filled with sadness, poverty, loss and grief. We ask ourselves, over and over again, how can we live amidst such difficulty and pain? The task of bringing relief to the suffering often seems insurmountable.

The truth is that our hearts ache for those who suffer no matter where in the world they are or for what reason the suffering exists. Yet, as much as we want to offer support and assistance, there doesn’t seem to be enough that we can do to create change. However, we will endeavor to bring relief wherever and whenever possible. Our capacity to love is great.

The question is, how do we look upon the sorrows of this world while maintaining balance and joy within ourselves? How can we be of service when our hearts are breaking? These are tough questions for very tough situations.  Where will the resilience come from that will give us the strength and the courage to accept the world as it is? Is it possible?

Yes! It is!

We first must understand that we provide the most help to another when we are clear and balanced ourselves. Happiness is infectious. The human spirit is astonishingly powerful in its ability to choose happiness in spite of life circumstances. And life, it appears, is actually a menagerie of choices. Choices result in experience. Experience results in knowledge; our choices result in life experiences that ultimately bring growth, understanding and wisdom.

At the expense of sounding a bit philosophical, our power stems from our ability to choose. We can choose happiness. And once we do, we can empower others to do the same.

So, next time we find ourselves asking the question why, why, why?  Maybe we will quickly come to the conclusion, choose, choose, and choose.

When my kids were younger, each season brought with it a different type of sport. That meant fall, winter, spring and summer, they were participating (or just enjoying) varied kinds of physical activity.

As they got older, I started noticing that coaches were pushing for same-sport off-season training (year around). It bothered me for several reasons. First, I think kids need to explore a variety of kinds of activities to discover their giftedness (and they don’t know until they try new things). Second, the major push to be super competitive (at the risk of an athlete’s health) bugged me too. I’m all for athletic events and team sports if they teach kids to demonstrate good sportsmanship, a teamwork mentality, and it’s a health/strength enhancer (not detractor).

So, it was especially telling to me that some of my hesitations about year-round same-sport conditioning have a fact basis from a medical standpoint alone. Read on… you’ll discover some very good reasons for rethinking your child’s sports training regime as well as what to look for if you’re not sure when enough is enough.

Dr. Christopher A. Foetisch, orthopedic surgeon, weighs in on the trends he is observing between kids and sports training.

As a physician who specializes in sports medicine, I routinely evaluate kids with sports injuries. Over the past several years, I have noted an increase in problems related to overuse injuries.

• In years’ past, kids would play a fall sport, winter sport and a spring sport. This essentially amounted to a cross training program. Now children participate in outdoor, indoor and camps focused on one sport. As a result, their bodies are being subjected to repetitive stresses that result in overuse injuries.

• Typically, these problems are not serious. The child will experience pain in a particular body part that occurs after a specific activity.

• Occasionally, the pain will cause the child to favor or protect the painful extremity and this can lead to an acute injury that can be very significant.

• Parents need to be aware if the child is in pain at a level that begins to affect performance. If this occurs, the child should be rested for a sufficient period of time that allows the athlete to resume their sport without pain.

• If they resume their activity and the pain returns, the child should be evaluated by a physician experienced in sports injuries.

• Also, I am strongly in favor of children crossing training with different activities. I do not believe it is wise for a growing body to participate in the same sport or activity year round.

• I am commonly asked “How is my child going to get a scholarship if they don’t play and practice all year long?” My response is: “Schools do not give scholarships to injured athletes.”

As with anything in life there needs to be a balance. Certainly, in sports there can be too much of a good thing.

It’s the big human question, isn’t it? We all want to be appreciated for who we are. We want to be loved. We want to be wanted. But the underlying question is, “can you get YOU?”

In order for anyone to get you, the first step has to be understanding you who are, and this comes from within. Until you get this piece, you will never be able to attract to you those people who will appreciate you for who you are. Think about it—if you don’t appreciate yourself for who you are, how can you expect the Law of Attraction to work for you? And you can’t appreciate yourself until you fully get your own truth!

Most of us believe we are who people have told us we are, starting from the time we were in diapers. We have been raised to take on the persona that we perceive to be the one that makes us desirable to others, and along with this comes a whole slew of limiting beliefs, such as “children should be seen and not heard”, “it’s not ok to speak up because I might be wrong”, “if I was just prettier (or had more money) then they would like me”, etc. The list of erroneous beliefs we carry is huge, and it shapes not only our outward persona but our inner landscape as well.

Take time today to figure out your own truth. Start with what’s important to you—those values that you would defend at any cost. These are your core values, and the basis of your true self. Examine all your beliefs. Write them down and determine for each one where you learned it. If it came from anyone outside yourself, decide whether it still serves you and is appropriate for you to carry forward. Create a mission statement for your life going forward.

Now you are in a position to start to get to know yourself. Now you can project your real self into the world, and soon enough you will realize that by getting yourself, others will as well!

Photo Credit: Max Elman

Can we create a happy life for ourselves?

The key word here is “create.”  Do we cultivate a happy life when we choose to live a life of creativity and passion? Does the secret to our ultimate happiness lie in the mere choosing of it?

You see, everyone is creative.  When we expand our definition of creativity to include far more than the fine arts, we come to realize that all life is art, and we can apply our unlimited creativity and individual expression in any direction we choose.

At this particular point in history, we are at a beautiful crossroads for profound creativity to come forth.  The future existence of humanity depends on the birth of new ideas to change how we have been living up to now.

We must find new ways to fuel our vehicles and heat our homes.  We must discover news ways of healing the body, mind and spirit.  We must continue to make revolutionary advancements in education and government.  We must find new ways to sustain and purify our environment. We must apply our new ideas and creative solutions to boost our ailing economy.

It is incumbent upon us to cultivate our inherent potential for bliss. As human we have a great capacity for emotion. When we sow the seeds of joy we harvest happiness within ourselves.

Not to make light of any of the critical issues we are facing, but we can forage ahead in happiness in spite of these crises.  We can simply choose to be happy.  We can draw upon our-H-Factor.  We can then choose to use our grand creative potential to solve some of the problems we’re facing whether they are personal or global in nature.

We can, in spite of it all, enjoy the journey.

By Michele Howe.

Taking a misstep here would be fatal.

Taking a misstep in daily life happens more often than we realize (with perhaps not fatal results, but otherwise unhealthy ones.)

Why?

It’s so easy to lose our focus (lose our orientation) because of the demands placed on us by others (and ourselves.)

Keeping your orientation is one principle that crosses over into every area of life.

Home. Work. Health. Play.

Not convinced?

See how this phrase, “Keeping Your Orientation” put me on notice after a fast-paced morning in the operating room.

Not too long ago, I was given the opportunity to observe a shoulder surgery operation. While the entire morning was riveting, I keep recalling one specific step the surgeon performed at the outset of the procedure. Before the doctor could begin to repair his patient’s injured shoulder, he needed to correctly identify and mark the places on her body where he would make the necessary cuts. As he carefully felt around her shoulder, I later found out he used her bony anatomy to “keep his orientation.”

Interesting phrase, and what a great parallel to everyday life.

As busy adults, we’re frequently sidetracked from our main purposes because we have lost our orientation.

That is, we become so bombarded by overwork, busyness, and the stresses that deplete our emotional and physical reserves, that we lose sight of what’s most important. Our visual clarity becomes blurred, we grow unsure of what’s the next best step to take, and we grow so desperate for relief we end up simply living in survival mode.

Said another way, when we’ve lost our primary focus, we often relegate our decision-making to whatever’s easiest, closest at hand, or requires the least amount of resistance. Which, over time, can quickly become problematic on multiple levels.

In the same way a surgeon takes the necessary time to deliberately study his patient’s injuries, illnesses and weaknesses before carefully mapping out his plan to correct, so should we similarly take the needed time to plan our days, weeks, and months (to ensure optimal home, work, health, and play environments.)  Staying on task (while moving toward our main objectives) grows simpler when we routinely keep an eye balanced between today’s immediate responsibilities and tomorrow’s more flexible expectations (and we make adjustments accordingly).

Keeping Your Orientation in Three Easy Steps (So as not to misstep)

• Take a brief glance to the month ahead – know what’s coming, but don’t spend too much time mulling over the details.

• Keep an eye on the week ahead – make it a habit to do a cursory review of the next seven days at the beginning of every week, then issue verbal/written reminders to each family member.

• Pay careful attention to the following day – every night before bed make all necessary practical preparations for the smoothest possible transition into a new day.

I have had the pleasure of reading Inspire Me Today for some weeks now. Really good stuff here.

There are truly some outstanding ideas, like breathe in beauty. I have been telling my patients this every day with amazing results.

And jot down emotional experiences to have for today. That is an outstanding idea.

But I come from the world of brain wave recordings, MRI, and measuring electrical muscle output. I write in my own book that no one has ever been cured of stress by reading a book. You must have actions, movements, stretch and reaching, and writing and sketching. There must be physical actions: the more senses you employ the better.

When we train a surgeon, it makes little difference how many books she has read on surgery of the body – she is not a surgeon until her hands and brain have performed the actions.

When you read Inspire Me Today, if this particular inspiration resonates with you, plan a daily action to go with it.

For example, breathe in beauty. Why not plan at noon to spend several minutes doing this action? Breathe in the beautiful flower, the sun on a picture, a strikingly beautiful photograph. Write these down. No doubt after two weeks this circuit will be implanted in your brain – we can actually show that a new part of your brain is functioning.

Write a to do list for emotional experience. Do this daily on arising. But write it down. The sight of a sunset, the warmth of being with a close friend, writing that letter to a loved one. The ACTION of writing down your to do for an emotional experience will make this part of your being. For example the feeling of satisfaction when you walk up that long flight of stairs, or finish the gym class.

Don’t get held back by can’t and don’t. Enlarge your senses. Learn to identify objects by feel. You already do this when you fish for your keys in your purse. But if you enlarge this sense of touch, you enlarge your brain circuits. Identify objects in your closet by feel. Feel the clothes on sale, than look at the label to see if you guessed wool, cotton, or synthetic correctly.

Smell can be expanded too. At the perfume counter, identify the odor first, then look to see if it is jasmine or rose.

These actions expand your brain, your creativity and are much more meaningful than simply thinking about it. The idea of practicing the bow and arrow in your mind and then hitting the target is wrong; just as wrong as the idea of learning tennis by reading a book and seeing a movie. You must do the actions.

There is a reason why there are fifty actions programs to follow in my book. I get my patients to lower their blood pressure, not by thinking pleasant thoughts, but by daily repetition of actions like breathing in count of four and out count of six; or using the mirror to SEE the face, jaw and shoulders relax.

Yes, you can be inspired by reading the Inspire Me Today works, but in order to get meaningful use out of them, imagine you are learning a tennis serve: daily actions, some sort of coach (could be a mirror or a partner), some sort of feedback – every day you did it “better.” The number of good tennis serves gets higher; the number of “positive actions” gets higher.

Yes, and don’t forget the reward of an ice cream cone for a week of daily actions!

When was the last time you just said “YES” and went for something that you have always dreamed of like moving to a new location, leaving an old job and starting a business or creating healthier habits?

Some of us have been taught that we were not good enough nor smart enough to do and have what we want…. What if I told you that is a complete MYTH and a fixed belief that was taught to you by someone who has fear themselves and projects their own fears onto others (not intentionally though because that person was taught to be fearful from someone else)? Some examples of fixed beliefs or fears are as follows:

One needs a university or college education to be successful. As we know Bill Gates does not. Some people might not need a diploma to achieve their goals and some might. It depends on what your goals are. However that diploma does not define who you are, it’s just some extra training to do an even better job at what you are passionate about.

The early bird gets the worm. I don’t know about you, but when I walk the dog in the morning I see all the birds eating. I love sleep and sometimes I don’t always wake up early, which does not mean I am not getting that worm. In reality when I work on my own internal clock, I achieve more in a day… so I would say I get a large sum of worms.

What this all really boils down to is that your dreams and aspirations are YOURS and it is important to look at your options, focus and say “YES” to deserving to live a life that you love.

These fixed beliefs/fears are just warning signals that you are on the right path; I tell my clients that it is just your ego giving you an option, which is what the ego’s role is. You see the ego tells you everything you are NOT, so that you can remember who you are. So when a fear or a fixed belief presents itself in your life, it actuality means that this fear or fixed belief will be something great that you will achieve.

I remember having to do a scene from Shakespeare in grade 10 and reciting it in front of my entire class. I read that scene at least a hundred times and when it came to my turn to do the scene I forgot most of what I was trying to memorize because I was so nervous. As I stood up there shaking in my boots, my teacher said “You can stop there Tara, speaking in front of people really is not your strong suit.” I remember feeling so low and my ego made me feel even lower.

Something magical happened later that day after I had a good cry, I heard this little voice say to me “You are already great at speaking; you just need to believe that you are.” I shrugged off that little voice and tried to avoid speaking in front crowds through most of the rest of high school.

The most interesting things kept happening to me though, I kept getting asked to speak out my assignments or read out loud in most of my classes. The more I tried to avoid it the more the situations kept coming to me to speak in front of crowds. Every time I got nervous I reminded myself of that little voice that said “You are already great at speaking, you just need to believe that you are.” I was able to feel more confident over the years and now I speak at filled events and conferences on a regular basis.

That day in grade 10 was one of the greatest blessings I received from that teacher’s comment. She gave me a gift by projecting a fear upon me and that fear allowed me to grow and learn even more about my ego and that your ego just gives you the opposite of who you are and to remember why you are here and what you are meant to do in this life time. I am sure you can all see from this story, one of my life purposes here is to speak and share knowledge to help others move past fear and fixed beliefs.

Now I ask each of you to think of a fixed belief or fear that you might have and say “YES” to following the steps to let go of that fear or fixed belief to achieve your goals and dreams. Your fears do become your greatest accomplishments.

Happiness starts with you. It is all about your attitude toward life and the situations you face in daily living. You have to look at what you have accomplished in a day, a week, a month, etc. – not what you haven’t accomplished. If you are having trouble finding happiness in your day and it seems like your attitude is shifting to negative things, here are a few tips for you:

• Try to change the way you look at things by looking at the bright side.
• Focus on solutions, not the problems.
• Listen to music that will lift you up, not bring you down.
• Watch a comedy movie when you are feeling down; it will make you laugh.
• Take a few minutes out of your day to read something inspiring.

When you start to think about negative things, try to change those thoughts to something positive.  Always look at what you have accomplished, not at what you haven’t.

Every day, do something good for yourself. It can be something as simple as buying a book, eating something you enjoy, or watching your favorite TV show.

Every day, do at least one thing that makes others happy. You could help out one of your colleagues at work or offer a word of kindness to someone.

Balance. It’s something that we all aspire to maintain in our lives, but many times we fall a bit short of our desired outcome. In this day and age where always increasing pressures simultaneously pull us in multiple directions, it’s critically important to take the time to reconnect and add balance to our lives.

The question is, how do we do that?

For me, balance starts with an intention to separate “me” from what’s going on around me. It’s making the time to recognize, acknowledge and appreciate the inner “me”, and knowing that the world will keep on spinning without me for a bit. It’s putting down the multiple balls that I juggle on a day-to-day basis, knowing it’s okay to do so. Actually, it’s more than “okay” to do so, it’s a requirement for us to be the best  that we can be.

How can we live an inspiring life if we don’t take the time to be inspired?

For me personally, I find it easiest to take the time to go inside and be inspired when I remove myself physically from the places and situations where stress lives. In other words, I change my surroundings, and get out of my office and into the woods. Walking in nature has always been my personal refuge. I probably shouldn’t admit it, but many mornings I’ll actually talk out loud to the trees or to my dog, as I walk amidst the splendor of the forest… and something magical happens.

There’s something very grounding about putting one’s feet at the base of a tree that has stood for fifty to a hundred years… something that literally grounds the thoughts and emotions inside of me and puts my life back into perspective.

After an hour’s communion in the woods, I find a sense of balance in my life and I realize that I am not my problems. I remember that I am so much bigger than what’s going on around me. I am capable of solving any problem, because I’m tapped into a Source that is unlimited and infinite. And all of this comes from simply creating the intention for balance, and making the time to allow it to happen.

I’m curious to know: In your busy everyday life, how do you strive for balance? By replying you will be entered to win one of two prizes! We learn and grow by sharing, so thank you in advance for sharing your story with us! We appreciate you!

First Prize: $150 to a Local Spa, plus $50 Gift Certificate to the Cerra Boutique.

Second Prize: One of Five $100 Gift Certificate to the Cerra Boutique.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Cerra. The opinions and text are all mine. Official Contest Rules.

I was telling a good friend how much I had been appreciating reading two books on gratitude – the kind of gratitude that is not dependent upon having good things happen or experiencing favorable circumstances.

In other words, developing an attitude of gratitude that “sticks” no matter what.

This friend (whom I am always so grateful for…) recommended another book on the same theme called 365 Thank Yous by John Kralik.

The timing of this book was perfect because this author, a lawyer, discusses his 15 months of sending out 365 thank-yous to different people who touched his life and how it changed him forever.

Recognizing that time was slipping away from me and soon I’d be in recovery mode for a while (and unable to write with my left hand), I decided the month of August would be my month to send thank-yous.

Reading about Kralik’s inner transformation as he began (very uncomfortably at first) to come up with people/things/events for which to give thanks…sparked in me some forgotten (people/things/events) for which I was grateful but had forgotten to say, “Thank you,” to the people responsible for bringing good into my life.

As Kralik writes, “I did not view writing thank-you notes as a self-help system, nor did I view it as a new, positive psychological method to delude myself into believing that my life is better than it really is or to cultivate an artificial state of well-being. This is just an exercise in average good manners. At the risk of making an unscientific and directly moral statement, I will say writing thank-you notes is a good thing to do and makes the world a better place. It also made me a better man. More than success or material achievement, this is what I sought.”

Throughout this book, Kralik is continually amazed at the power of a simple written, “thank-you,” and how it totally changed him (on the inside) and his relationship with the recipients of his expressions of thanks. Whenever he wrote and shared his “thanks” it “stuck” and everyone was the better for it.

Kralik has pretty much mastered the art of writing a thank you note…but he gives one primary suggestion for everyone to follow.

“The one sure piece of advice I have on how to write thank-yous is this: write a lot of them.”

Making the most of every birthday (every day)…aging strong (and healthy.)

I love birthdays…my own and everyone else’s!

Call it a hangover from childhood memories and those early traditions…but birthdays are the single one day of the whole year when it’s just fun to pick what you where you want to go (sitting on a warm beach) and what you want to do (sitting on a warm beach with a great book and playing my favorite music) and what you want to eat (sitting on a warm beach with a great book and playing my favorite music while enjoying iced tea + pizza + dark chocolate) …so when I’m trying to decide to how “help” a friend celebrate their special day…I try to tailor their wants and needs and match it to them specifically (and their age)!

In a similar way, every birthday we pass should cue us into thinking about our health…in particular, our bone health. Often, we give very little thought to proactively caring for this aspect of our bodies…but we should.

If you’ve ever wondered what “bone density” means as you age, here’s your answer.

At every decade of life, specific changes are occurring. Below, orthopedic surgeon Dr. Christopher A. Foetisch explains this aging process and how to keep your bones at their strongest density ever.

TWENTIES:  As we age, bodies go through a gradual process of breakdown. In the early twenties, bone density is at its greatest. From that point forward, bone density begins to gradually decline. Therefore, women want to start at the point with the greatest bone density, so that when the breakdown process begins they have a higher starting point from which to decline.

THIRTIES:  This means that in the thirties, it is vital to consume the proper amount of calcium and vitamin D. Also, weight-bearing exercises are important to stimulate the formation of strong, dense bones. At this age, the most common injuries are traumatic in nature.

FORTIES:  Bone loss now begins to increase at a faster pace. If there is a strong family history of bone related issues, it is important to make one’s primary care physician aware of this fact. Exercise and calcium with vitamin D become even more important. Again, any bone injuries tend to be traumatic in nature.

FIFTIES:  In the fifties, osteoporosis can become a real issue. If you have not done a good job of maintaining good bone density, osteoporosis related fractures can begin to occur. Typically, the type of injuries seen are that of wrist and ankle fractures. A bone density scan should be considered at this time.

SIXTIES and SEVENTIES:  Here, osteoporosis related problems begin to significantly increase. This is commonly seen in the form of hip, pelvic and spinal fractures. More aggressive medical treatment such as medication to reduce bone loss should be considered at this time. A follow-up bone density scan should be performed at this point.

I’m in New York City today, taking part in the Million Moms Challenge. It’s a cause to unite a million moms with a million moms in developing countries around the world. The best thing about this program is that you don’t have to be a mom to help a mom. You just have to be “one in a million”.  Join us to make healthy pregnancies, safe births, and children who survive and thrive a basic right around the world.

As a part of this project, I’ve been asked to answer the question, “What was the best or worst moment of your pregnancy?”

This is such an easy answer, as for me, the best part of the pregnancy was the moment that I found out that I was going to be a mother. Even though I first became pregnant more than 30 years ago, I can still remember that very moment, reading the words “You’re Pregnant”, as if it were yesterday!

At that moment in time, the world stopped. Nothing mattered but that tiny life inside of me. I wanted to tell everyone I knew and every stranger that crossed my path. “I’m pregnant!”, I wanted to shout it to the world. Life as I knew it had forever changed. Suddenly it wasn’t just about my husband and me any longer- there was a bigger force in action in my life.

When I’m on my deathbed years from now, that moment etched into the fabric of who I am, will remain one of my most treasured memories. And, interestingly enough, when I became pregnant with my second child, the same thing happened again- even though I already was a mother.

I marvel at the wonder of Nature and the special magic that takes a young woman and changes her in an instant. For those of you who are mothers, perhaps you too experienced the moment when time stood still… when nothing else mattered but that little life, that you were there to love, nurture and protect. In that instant, we became women, sisters bound by the repeating cycle of motherhood.

In my collection of moments that matter that I’ve gathered throughout my life, I’ll forget the crayons in the dryer, the magic market on the carpet, the spilled juice on my best dress and even cleaning up the mess of a sick child at 2am. But I’ll never forget two of the very best moments in my life… when I found out that I was pregnant, for these are the moments that matter.

I’d love to hear more about your best or most difficult pregnancy moments. By commenting, you will be entered to win an exclusive Million Moms Challenge Gift Pack, which includes an all expenses paid trip to a conference on mothers hosted by the UN Foundation in DC (Jan/Feb 2012), an iPad2, a custom-made Million Moms Challenge pendant and $50 donation in your name to Global Giving. Contest and prize details here.

Click here to comment.

I hope you’ll join the challenge – just visit the Million Moms Challenge to sign up!

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Million Moms Challenge. The opinions and text are all mine. Contest runs September 19 to October 16, 2011. A random winner will be announced by October 18, 2011. Official Contest Rules.

Life comes with a little secret: Every plan will not always unfold effortlessly. It is important to know that THIS IS OKAY. It is all a part of becoming who you dream of being, doing what you’re destined to do, and living that life that you’ve always wanted to.

This is a lesson that I have recently come to realize, and am currently in the midst of grasping. So, I started a new blog to document what I call my in-between experience: coming back to Michigan after living a glimpse of my dream, writing for the summer in New York City, right after receiving my Bachelor’s degree from Grand Valley State University.

With a current plan to save up financially and figure out my next move, inspiration is key in staying sane throughout this whole process of in-between. While I am wholeheartedly hoping that my next [and final] move will be to California, I’ve accepted the fact that Florida might come first, just for the winter, to stay with my grandmother and continue to save money before settling in California. That is what life is, essentially- a collection of stepping stones to get to where you need to be, where you’d like to go.

As I document my in-between, my hope is that I will help make others’ similar journey much easier and less stressful. It will all work out if you believe that it will. It takes time, patience, planning, and a little bit of responsibility, but it’s nothing that should ever make one feel the need to fully “grow up,” because where’s the fun in that? I will be a child-at-heart forever; that is a fact.

To conquer this in-between stage, I’ve been keeping myself busy ever since the plane landed in Detroit on August 13. Writing for a music website, working for Detroit Live Magazine, and babysitting regularly for a few different families, my financial situation has prospered greatly in these past few weeks. I’m constantly keeping an eye out for jobs in my field, Professional Writing, and surrounding myself with positive, encouraging souls who want what’s best for me: to succeed and be happy.

I believe that surrounding yourself by people who truly and fully support you is key. I have struggled through the opposite side of this, and I can absolutely say that it makes a colossal difference. Being surrounded by negativity will take a toll on your outlook and life, inevitably. To prevent this, make a conscious decision to stick by those who keep your spirit high, and be sure to be a positive light for others, too.

The New York Times just released an article titled, “Generation Limbo: Waiting It Out,” which discusses my generation of current college graduates who are waiting for their degree-driven careers to begin. However, I believe that all who refuse to give up in the quest to obtain their dream job, despite the struggling economy, will succeed. We just need to believe that we can push past this challenging time.

Brittney Schering is a 22 year old recent college graduate. To learn more about Brittney, visit about.me/BrittneySchering.

Photo Credit: Max Elman

In the meantime, for those of you in NYC who would like to be on TV, here’s your chance!

Good Morning America will be covering the launch of the Million Moms Challenge campaign on Monday, Sept 19th. If you are going to be in NY and would like to have a cameo on the show, join hundreds of women, moms, dads, kids and companies gathering in Times Square at 7:30am EST. Here’s how you can join us: Meet outside ABC News Times Square studio on the southeast corner of 44th and Broadway on Monday morning, Sept 19th. When its time, hold up the index finger of your right hand and open your left palm like this: Write the words “Million Moms” on the palm of your left hand.

The audience coordinator will let you know when the shot is live – smile for the camera! Remember, you don’t have to be a mom to help a mom. You just have to be one in a million. If you can’t make it to Times Square, be sure to watch Good Morning America on Monday morning and see your fellow moms and bloggers! You can also tweet “I’m one in a million for healthy moms & babies around the world. Join #AMillionMoms with me!”

Thanks for your support and stay tuned for more details on this global campaign uniting moms around the world.

All of us like to feel valued and appreciated. However, it is easier for most of us to go through our day forgetting to complete simple acts of kindness.

My husband is in sales, and much of the time he travels. I try to find little ways to tell him that I appreciate his work and that I will miss him while he is gone. I might stick little handwritten notes in different parts of his suitcase. One time I made him a set of note cards with numbers marked on the front to show him when he should open them. Once when he came home I had a welcome home banner across the door. I like to wait till he least expects it and then I surprise him!

Peter is also very good at surprising me. Every day as he drives to work he calls my cell phone and leaves a really sweet message – usually telling me about the weather, the traffic, to have a great day and always to remember how much he loves me!

I learned how rude people can be when I worked as a receptionist at a well known beauty salon in Atlanta. The ladies would leave the salon making sure they had their next appointment. I remember they would speak to me as if I was totally unintelligent – making sure I had their appointments correct. Then they would dismiss me or say something demeaning. I never let it bother me. Actually I felt sorry for some of them. I know when you treat another person poorly; you don’t have a good opinion of yourself.  Do not misunderstand me, for every lady who was rude there were ten that were very mannerly. This made my job fun and it also gave me a new perspective of what people who deal with the public go through day after day.

When I taught school it was always important to appreciate my students! It was not only important to appreciate the students, their parents, and the administrative staff – it was especially important to say thank you to the custodians and cafeteria staff.  All of these people work very hard to make a school a successful place of learning.

I wasn’t always thankful and appreciative. It was not a skill that was taught to me during my “growing up” years. It is a skill I taught myself or perhaps I learned from observing the many good people that came through my life. I have learned that in order to have peace in my life I must first make someone else’s life better.

I remember when I was first learning this new found skill. It was around Father’s Day. I wanted to do something special for my dad so I sat down and wrote a list of all the good times I could remember with him. I think it was a list of around 25 or 30 things. Stuff like – remembering when he would take all of the cheerleaders to the Dairy Queen for ice cream after a game! I just wanted him to know how special all of those memories are to me. He loved it!

I am glad to say this skill of appreciation and thanks has become second nature to me. When I wake up, the first thing I do is to thank God for the day! At the gym I try to always greet the front desk people with a smile and a word of thanks when I leave. When I take a workout class I make sure to thank the instructor for a good class. At a store I try to be patient with the sales people and I always say thank you for helping me. At the hair salon I am very courteous with the reception staff – since I’ve been there done that. When I cross paths with the mail carriers I say thanks and if it is a hot day I ask them if I can give them a cold bottle of water. The man who tends to my yard and garden works so hard doing such wonderful work. I always make sure he knows how much he is appreciated.

These are just little examples of showing kindness and appreciation. My friends know from experience that sometimes I will surprise them with a card in the mail or a handwritten note. I’m sure e-mails have there place and little handwritten notes or letters are so much more personal. If you have to use a computer utilize some of the terrific internet card sites. When I send an e card I use the Jacque Lawson card site. I’m sure there are several others.

They say if you do anything for 21 days in a row it becomes a habit. For the next 21 days take time to appreciate the people you live with, work with and encounter throughout your day. Find little unique ways to make other people feel special.  Let me know what you do to thank and appreciate others. I would love to hear what you do and I would love to hear from the person receiving your kindness!

Remember everyone needs to feel valued and appreciated. If you are a kid, teen, young adult, then appreciate your parents, your teachers. Try to look at things from their perspective. Adults try to remember when you were a kid! Workers think about what you can do to make your workplace a more peaceful place. Maybe that employee just needs a pat on the back or some understanding about something he/she might be going through at home. Employees maybe your boss needs the same consideration.

Take time to thank someone and appreciate those who assist you in your day. Stop a moment to share this article/blog with someone. Post it to your facebook page, web pages or other bulletin boards where people will take notice. Go to my facebook page at Mary Ellen Ciganovich and post on my facebook wall the way you are taking time to show appreciation or Thanks! Let’s all work together to share little notes of appreciation and words of thanks. It WILL make a difference!

Sincerely with Love,

Mary Ellen Ciganovich

Photo Credit: Max Elman

My name is Roslyn Franken. I was born to a mother who survived the concentration camps of Nazi Germany and a father who survived the atomic bomb in Nagasaki, Japan, as a prisoner of war. The only thing they said kept them going was their hope and courage to face each new day with a renewed determination to never give up. This attitude was their choice.

When diagnosed with cancer at age 57, my mother told the doctor, “Hitler didn’t get me, my cancer won’t get me.” Doctors gave her two years to live. She died 21 years later. Her cancer came back five times over those years and each time she’d bounce back and defy the odds. With all that she had already suffered in her lifetime, she could have easily played the victim, but once again she chose to ‘never give up’.

When I was diagnosed with cancer at age 29, I quickly learned that I inherited my parents ‘survivor’ attitude. I saw how my mother handled her cancer and realized that I had that same power of choice. We all have the power of choice. We can choose whatever we think, believe, say and do in response to any event or person crossing our paths, no matter what.

I could have thrown myself a big pity party, feeling sorry for myself and drowning in my own fears, worries and anxieties. There were so many unknowns, so many changes, so much pain and suffering. It was one of the most challenging times of my life, but I made the conscious choice to never give up. Just like my mother, I was not about to take it lying down. I couldn’t afford to let the negative fears, thoughts and emotions rob me of the positive energy I needed to fight my fight and beat my cancer. I was not about to give up hope or let my spirit be broken by my challenging circumstances. Then ten years later, at my heaviest weight and afraid for my health, I made the choice to fight back again, only this time to win my battles with food, weight and lifestyle obstacles, once and for all. It was my choice.

We all have the power of choice in every area of our lives. We don’t always realize it because we get so caught up in the rat race of trying to keep up with our endless To-Do lists and problems to solve, that we can’t see the forest through the trees. We end up neglecting what’s most important to us. We absolutely have the power of choice. We have the choice in how we spend our time and energy, what is most important to us and honoring our physical bodies and our inner selves. With every challenge, no matter what, we have the choice to be the victim or the victor, the worrier or the warrior. Your job is simply to choose wisely.

Photo Credit: Max Elman

A few days ago, my wife Lauren wrote a wonderful blog about the disappearance of manners that really resonated with me. Her blog focused on the lost art of writing handwritten “thank you” notes for gifts, rather than just taking the easy email route, which in turn got me thinking about the loss of manners in movie theaters and  almost everywhere we turn.

The “me” years seem to be signaling that common courtesy, admitting mistakes,  and polite behavior are not only no longer necessary, but are actually “corny” or, even worse, a sign of weakness.

Recently, I was struck by a line spoken by Danny Glover who played the President of The United States in the film 2012. When a scientist responded to a question by simply saying “I was wrong, sir”, Mr. Glover turned to an assistant and said “You know how many times people have said that to me in this office?” He then held up his thumb and forefinger to form a 0, as in “none.” (More on the shocking lack of courtesy in movie theaters themselves in a minute.)

So many people push to the heads of lines, ignore you if you nod and say hello, don’t say “please” or “thank you”, keep texting on their cell phones while in a face to face conversation with you, etc.

I was in the grocery store the other day, standing in the express line with 3 or 4 other people. We each had about 10 items in our cart when someone came up with 1 item, a loaf of bread. The first person in line kindly motioned the young man with the bread to go ahead of him, an act of courtesy that pleased me and one other person in line. Two other people, however, got noticeably irritated that they would have to wait another minute or two.

And movie theaters? The worst!!As I wrote in Bringing Back The Old Hollywood:

The Decline and Fall of The Theatrical Film Experience: Rudeness, Cell Phones, Texting, Ads, and High-Priced Cholesterol

The slide in the fortunes of The New Hollywood can also be traced to the degradation of the theater-going experience itself.

The movie palaces of yesterday have been replaced by mall multiplexes and the new theaters are, in most ways, superior in comfort and viewing to the old theaters.

Audiences, however, are very different today.

Inconsiderate, even rude, behavior is widespread.

People talk to each other during the film as if they were watching television on their couches at home. Even more vexing is that many people actually get very hostile even if they are politely asked to desist.

Cell phones ring and text messages are received and then answered.

In Woody Allen’s classic Annie Hall, there is a sequence in which Woody is standing in line for a movie, listening to another person pontificate about Marshal McLuhan’s media theories. (McLuhan’s seminal 1964 book Understanding Media coined the phrase “the medium is the message.”)

Allen then brings McLuhan himself on camera to tell the pontificator that he is dead wrong about everything he has said about McLuhan’s work.

Woody then turns to the camera and says “Wouldn’t it be great if real life really went like this?”

In today’s theaters, Woody might to have materialize the spirits of Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell, and Emily Post to tell patrons that telephones were not intended to be used in movie theaters so they should  “please shut up!”

So, in addition to Bringing Back The Old Hollywood, can we all please commit ourselves to bringing back common human courtesy as well?

Photo Credit: Woodley Wonderworks

Today the Domino Project releases End Malaria, not just a book, but a cause fueled by 62 business thinkers pushing you to rethink the way you work.

$20 from the purchase of every copy of End Malaria goes directly to Malaria No More, an international advocacy organization dedicated to ending malaria by 2015, and to send a mosquito net to a family in need and to support life-saving work in the fight against malaria.

In addition to saving lives, enjoy essays by 62 of American’s favorite business authors, including Tom Peters, Nicholas Carr, Pam Slim, and Sir Ken Robinson, Alan Webber, Dave Ramsey, Chris Brogan, Gary Vaynerchuk, Nancy Duarte, and more. Organized into three main sections—Focus, Courage, Resilience—and eight subsections—Tap Your Strengths, Create Freedom, Love & Be Kind, Disrupt Normal, Take Small Steps, Embrace Systems, Get Physical, Collaborate—all essays in End Malaria will inspire you to look within yourself for solutions to everyday dilemmas and to reach your goals, and editor, Michael Bungay Stanier, envisioned End Malaria as a book that would marry the best writers of the business world to a deserving cause. Michael assembled and edited this impressive collection with a goal to leverage that breadth of expertise these writers represent for an issue of global importance.

At its core, End Malaria is about doing great work including the hard work to save lives. All of the writers in this collection and all of the partners involved (The Domino Project, Box of Crayons, and Amazon) have waived all fees in order to raise the maximum amount of money.

We’re including this in our blog because we want to support such great work, and because we want to make sure you know about this opportunity to get great information AND help a worthy cause at the same time. This is the kind of project that inspires us!

My father often forwards inspirational emails to me. This morning he sent one that touched my heart.  As with most internet forwards, there’s no author listed, so I can’t give credit where credit is due. So to the unknown catalyst of inspiration, thank you for sharing your story with us. (And, thanks Dad!)

——————————————-

The Cab Ride

I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I walked to the door and knocked… “Just a minute”, answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.

After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90′s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940′s movie.

By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

“Would you carry my bag out to the car?” she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, and then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.

She kept thanking me for my kindness. “It’s nothing”, I told her… “I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.” “Oh, you’re such a good boy”, she said.

When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, “Could you drive through downtown?”

“It’s not the shortest way,” I answered quickly…

“Oh, I don’t mind,” she said. “I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.”

I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. “I don’t have any family left,” she continued in a soft voice… “The doctor says I don’t have very long.” I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.

“What route would you like me to take?”, I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.

We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the sun was setting, she suddenly said, “I’m tired. Let’s go now.”

We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up as they must have been expecting her.

I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

“How much do I owe you?”, she asked, reaching into her purse.

“Nothing,” I said

“You have to make a living,” she answered.

“There are other passengers”, I responded.

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

“You gave an old woman a little moment of joy”, she said. “Thank you.”

I squeezed her hand, and then walked away… Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life…

I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life.

We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one. It’s the little things that mean the most.

People may not remember exactly what you did or what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel.

When I was in my late teens, the universe connected me with my mentor Cindy. She is the one who guided me to use my intuitive gifts on such a deep level. Because of her I am able and grateful to help thousands of people all over the world and know how to harness these intuitive experiences that have been happening since I was a young child.

This spring 2012, the first book of a “faction” (fact and fiction) series will be released that I co-authored with my dear friend and amazing fiction writer Lorna Schultz Nicholson. This series is based on my life as an intuitive teen and what it is like to grow into adulthood with the ability to see a whole other world that is not seen by the naked eye.

Cindy is of course one of the main characters (some characters are real people and some are fiction… one of the things that makes this series so great is that you will question who is real and who is fictional) in the series because she was such a huge part in my life and still is very much so today.

Cindy was a great intuitive, if not the best I have met to date, and she taught me how to best use my intuitive gifts that I had no idea how to control. It has been many years now she has crossed over to the other side, but I still share the insight she shared with me and continue to build and critique the foundations she taught me on how to use my intuitive gifts and pass those down to who all is wanting to go deeper with their own intuition.

One of my favorite things she taught me and we critiqued together was manifesting when the New Moon arrives. I have shared this in my newsletter in the past and received an outpouring of fabulous feedback on very positive results. I would like to share this with you all as well.

Manifesting Your Desires with the New Moon

The first two nights of a New Moon are the best time to ask for new things in life (relationships, home, career, etc).

Write out one of the most important things you want to manifest in the next three weeks on a piece of white paper and address it: Dear Universe, God or Angels (whichever you feel most connected too). Then write the same thing you want to manifest as if you already have received it and then end it by writing: With love and gratitude, [your name]. Here’s a complete example:

Dear Universe, God and Angels,

I am focused on manifesting my new job position and co-creating that experience with you by affirming that I am happy and grateful that I have my new job position in these next three weeks.

With love and gratitude,

John Smith

Just like I have explained to all of you before, it is very important to write out on paper the things that you would like to have happen and then affirm that they have already happened after you have written it out.

Now find the window in your home that gets the most direct moon light the first night of new moon and tape the letter to the window with the words pointing out towards the moon.

Keep it in the window for three days and then take it down and put it somewhere safe so that you can re-read it in three weeks. You will see that your manifestation is coming together quickly and/or it will have already happened within the three weeks.

Cindy and I manifested in great speed with this technique and I have heard many success stories from others that I have shared this technique with. Some have manifested cars, houses, or money; others have attracted soulmates quicker, new clients and business… just to name a few.

I would love to hear your experiences with this technique and share them in my weekly newsletter. Please feel free to email me about them at infotarataylorca.

Photo Credit: Paul Tomlin

I was a friend, yet I didn’t know that he needed help.

The loss of Trey makes me wonder how many other people are struggling, and are embarrassed or afraid to reach out for help.

It’s a reminder to me to take the time to be there for those I love, and for those in need. It’s a wake up call for all of us- to be there for one another, and to love one another.

Life is short, and in some cases, way too short. If you’re depressed or need help, please reach out to a friend or to the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. There are caring individuals to help and who care. YOU MATTER!

Trey’s last tweet shared love with the community that surrounded him, yet wasn’t there for him in his time of need. Shortly after this tweet he ended his life.In honor of Trey and to prevent a needless tragedy from happening again, please make a difference today by reaching out in person, by phone or even online to share love with someone in need. Share how much their being here on this planet matters to you personally. We all have problems and troubles that sometimes get us down.

Knowing that we’re not alone and that others care can make a big difference- sometimes, the difference of life and death.

Not sure who to send love to? If you search the term “need a hug” on Twitter, you’ll find many folks tweeting every minute, looking for love and acknowledgment that they matter and that someone cares.

Go send five hugs to strangers, because your kindness will make a difference. Then, take that sentiment with you today and share love where you go.

Our prayers go out to Trey’s family today as the world grieves the loss of this bright light.

Today is the perfect time to share love. Share a hug. Be the friend that you want others to be for you. Don’t assume that someone knows how you feel- tell them now, before it’s too late.

Last, know that YOU matter. Although we may only be connected via this post, I care about you. InspireMeToday.com is here to help in any way that we can, so please reach out and let us know how we can be of service to you. Your being here is a gift to this world.

With love and appreciation for who you are,

Gail

While I was waiting in line at the post office, a wonderful gentleman and I exchanged “Good mornings” to each other. When I asked him how he was, he answered “Well, I’m 90 years old today, young fella, so I would say I’m doing pretty great.”

At 65, no one has called me “young fella” in a long, long time, so, obviously he made my day and I told him so.

“Congratulations”, I said. “I’m 65 so you’re actually old enough to be my father, right?”

Smiling slyly, he responded with a wink. “Nah…I was always way too careful for that.”

He then patted me on the shoulder as he walked up to the clerk, who had obviously heard our conversation, and welcomed the gentleman with “Happy 90th to you, sir.” Whereupon the other 4 or 5 people in line chimed in with their own best wishes and a small smattering of applause, which the “birthday boy” accepted with a grin and a slight bow.

A couple of weeks ago, I was walking our lab Lola in a West Linn neighborhood near our home. On a particular street (Carriage Way, for you Portlanders), I was hoping to see a man named Theodore who is something of a local legend. At 92, he sits in the driveway outside his home on a lawn chair every morning when the weather is decent and greets everyone who walks and drives by. As the weather in Portland this “summer” has been a few notches worse than atrocious (don’t get me started), I wasn’t sure if he would be there, but the sun was out this morning so I was optimistic.

Sure enough, there he sat, with a blanket across his legs and his customary wide and welcoming grin.

“Good morning, Theodore!”, I greeted him as he was waving at the driver of a car as it passed by.

“Good morning, young man!”, he responded with a big smile. (Again, “young”. Life is good!)

We chatted for a few minutes as Lola sniffed around his chair and wagged her tail while he gently patted her head.

When I asked him how he was, he replied “Pretty damn good for an old man. I don’t hear all that well anymore, and I have to use this lovely cane my wife bought me to get around, but I still get out here every morning so I can talk to folks like you…and, of course, my regulars.” With that, he waved at another driver.

In the couple of minutes that we chatted, at least 3 or 4 cars drove by. All of them… ALL of them… slowed down and waved. A couple of drivers even shouted out “Good morning, Theodore!”, including a young child in the back seat of one of the cars.

As Lola and I said our good-byes, Theodore wished us well and said “Have a wonderful day…and come see me again tomorrow.”

So, today, there are no movie posters or discussions in this blog.

Just an acknowledgment that, despite all the troubles, heartaches, and challenges that we face each day, life can also still be magical, hopeful, and happy.

And we “young folks” in Acts 1 and 2 of life can still learn a lot from our elders who are enjoying Act 3 of theirs…. if only we just slow down and listen.

Be Here Now. A message that can change our lives!

When we hear these three little words from our teachers or read them in books, it sounds so simple. But when we try, the act is not easy. That’s because three worlds have to come together simultaneously in us. First, to focus on the body, the house of our Being. To do this, bring the mind’s attention to follow the sensation of your physical self, the breath that comes and goes, the blood that flows, the muscles that tense and relax, and the energy that moves through you.

What to call that experience? Perhaps ‘sensation’ or ‘energy’ or chi, but a quick thought or a word isn’t enough. It is a three-dimensional experience that brings a continuing dialogue between the body and the brain! It includes awareness of nerve cell messages, the blood coursing in its channels through muscle and around bone, and—at the center of all this activity—the breathing being that you are. Everything moves with the breathing. Even the head moves gently at the top, like a tourist in a howdah on an elephant’s back.

So you can access two worlds as your body and mind come together in the sensation of yourself. Now it’s time to be Here. Perhaps you are sitting in this awakened body/mind, in your living room where you can see your small world reflected in possessions and memories. Beyond it, the other rooms in your apartment. Perhaps above it, other floors, other rooms, other people. This is your own personal world. But perhaps you live in a street full of houses, a neighborhood, a city, state, country, world. And all of it, along with you, is cradled in the arms of the cosmos.

But wait! Your mind may become so busy reflecting on Here, you lose the place you occupy. That often happens to me. So now return to the sensation of yourself, Being Here. And at this point you can bring your attention to the only reality there is: this moment in time. Now.

Life often seems like a horizontal race (or sometimes crawl) over barriers, to a perceived wish or need, or to a more mysterious goal. Success? Happiness? But that vision misleads us. How to digest the stressful situations we often suffer and the sometimes unrealistic aims we set before ourselves? There’s the illusion that we have a whole life to live, while, in fact, none of us knows when our visit on planet Earth will end.

Put another way, Now is not a horizontal line, not a time-line. Its most accurate symbol is the cross, which represents this one vertical moment; my only connection with eternity. I am here now because I choose to be here, to experience my whole self at this moment in time: my body/mind/feeling self. At this point, I move beyond time to the timeless present. I am here now.

Patty de Llosa is the author of Taming Your Inner Tyrant (A Spiritual Evolution Press; 2011) and The Practice of Presence (Morning Light Press, 2006). She is a writer and a contributing editor of Parabola Magazine and teaches Tai Chi and the Alexander Technique. She was managing editor of American Fabrics & Fashions magazine, then associate editor of Leisure magazine, a Time, Inc. startup, moving on to Fortune magazine, where she became deputy chief of reporters. For more information, please visit tamingyourinnertyrant.com.

As my first post here on Inspire Me Today, I highlight my favorite film so far in 2011.

When I was 22 years old, the last 15 minutes of Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey introduced me to a cinematic concept of the vast wonder of the cycle of life and death that I had never even imagined before. At that time, I thought no one would ever again attain that kind of symbolic representation of spirituality on film.

And then I  saw The Tree of Life, which is so mind-bogglingly original and breathtaking that it truly defies description and categorization. The film is so majestically and subjectively emotional that seeing it feels more like a deeply personal and spiritual experience than it is the viewing of a film. One gets the sense that each one of us in the theater embarks on our own internal journey during the film and, as such, we experience the images on the screen in a completely individual manner.

Contrary to some other reviews, while the style of the film is indeed groundbreaking and dazzling, there most definitely is a story at the core of The Tree of Life. In it, Brad Pitt plays the father of three young boys growing up in Waco, Texas, in the 1950s. His relationship with his sons (and his wife, played with great humanity and compassion by Jessica Chastain) is one of extreme complexity, love, strict discipline, affection, reproach, fear, respect, and rebellion. Mr. Pitt’s performance in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button firmly established him as brilliant actor. Now, in The Tree of Life, Mr. Pitt has elevated his craft to a new league of brilliance as he gives one of the most nuanced, frightening, evocative, and haunting portrayals of a father in recent memory.

The true magic of the film, however, does indeed lie in the imagination, spirituality, and visual artistry of its reclusive and visionary writer/director director Terrence Malick. The word “genius” is thrown around so much in film nowadays that the word unfortunately loses some of its power when the real thing comes along. And Mr. Malick is unquestionably the real thing…to the Nth power.

Amazingly, The Tree of Life is only Mr. Malick’s fifth film since Badlands, his brilliant 1973 debut. Mr. Malick does not give interviews and does no publicity for his films. Even when The Tree of Life was given the distinct honor of being the opening night presentation (and ultimately winner of the Palme D’Or Award for best film) at the recent Cannes Film Festival, Mr. Malick was nowhere to be seen or heard. In that, he shares an eerie kinship with Stanley Kubrick who directed 2001 and really wanted his films to speak for themselves.  The Tree of Life certainly does do that.

The style and images of the film (including the very birth of life itself) are so unique and awe-inspiring that words truly cannot describe them. In a way, that lack of appropriate words is the entire key to the film and its title. How can anyone truly describe in words a spiritual experience of the very essence of nature, life, and death? Visually and emotionally, The Tree of Life propels us headlong into that journey in such a deeply pervasive way that I do feel the need to say here that the film is most definitely not for everyone.

While I was personally exhilarated and mesmerized by The Tree of Life, I can also completely understand and respect those who have said that they found the film to be depressing and even deeply disturbing. In Cannes, for instance, most audience members reportedly stood and cheered at the end of the screening there, but there were also a substantial number of people who booed mightily. As such, I strongly suggest that those who have real misgivings about seeing the film should respect those feelings and indeed stay away. If, however, you feel drawn to the film, you are in for the visual, emotional, and spiritual experience of a lifetime.

The Tree of Life is truly one of the most profoundly original, moving, and engrossing films that I have ever seen.

Yesterday’s Inspirational Luminary, Larry Hochman, spoke in his interview of how he stays on track, by setting daily intentions through writing letters to himself. We asked him to share a sample with our community, which he has done below.

If you haven’t listened to the interview yet, please do as there’s some great free content there for you to learn from and enjoy.

Sample Daily Intention

Good Morning Buddy!

OK, let’s get to work. Today I intend to feel organized. I intend to make a vet appointment for the cat. I intend to exercise strong and smart. I intend to have fun cleaning up the kitchen and my office. I intend to make an appointment with Chris to get him to fix the outdoor railing. I intend to begin creating the new blog. I intend to spread love all around me.

I intend for the Universe to handle bringing more training gigs to life! :)

Forest Gump’s mama once said that “Life is like a box of chocolates”. Last week we visited my brother-in-law, Brent’s home. As my 2 year-old granddaughter, Luna, sat on my husband’s lap picking blueberries, Brent explained to her that “Life is a lot like a blueberry bush”.

Luna spent a great deal of time, carefully inspecting each berry, selecting just one, then picking it, putting it into her mouth and truly savoring the flavor before moving on to the next one. It was a slow process, but with each individual selection, she made a conscious choice of which berry to eat, rather than just grabbing what was in front of her. Some were super sweet and she smiled, while some were a bit sour and she made funny faces as she tasted them. But regardless of her success, one after the next, she kept tasting more berries.

Brent explained that, to him, life itself is like that blueberry bush, filled with the different days of our lives. Some of them look good but may be sour, some aren’t quite ripe yet, while others are juicy, sweet and ripe with opportunity. But regardless of the taste, the only way to know what you’re going to get, is to taste the berries and enjoy the experience.

Okay, maybe the lesson was a bit too much for a 2 year-old, but this conversation was a reminder that every bush is filled with a selection of all kinds of berries, just as our life is filled with all kinds of days. When we get a sour one, it helps to remember that the next berry or the next day, could be our sweetest one yet. Instead of getting frustrated when we get a sour day, it helps to focus on the promise of a fresh, juicy berry, just as Luna kept picking until she found the sweetest berries on the bush.

So if by chance your day today tastes like a sour blueberry, my wish for you is that tomorrow as you enjoy the fruits of the blueberry bush called life, you experience your sweetest day ever!

What is the meaning of life? That is the universal question that we have all asked ourselves once, twice or everyday. In actuality, the question that we truly want to understand is, “What is MY meaning in this life?”

We look to others to answer this question. We seem to think that we don’t know.

In actuality, we do know. Each and every one of us has the answer embedded. It is in every fiber of our being, we have had the answer even before we came to our bodies. We hold our answer within us.  The question then becomes, “How do we retrieve this answer?”

We retrieve the answer by accepting and understanding that we have two parts within us, which I refer to as the duality, better known as Our Higher Self and Our Ego Self.

Understanding our own duality helps us to bring forth the awareness that all of us are here to achieve, our Soul’s Progression. In essence, we are each here fulfilling our soul’s progressions. What makes us each unique is that we each have a different soul’s journey that involves one or many life lessons. Our soul’s journey is built on both our ego and our higher self. Just like each of us is different, so are our ego traits depending on our soul’s journey.  The level of understanding we have of our own duality and what we choose to learn in this lifetime forms the basis of our ego traits.

The ego is with us in every decision we make and it is just as strong as the higher self. The biggest struggle is trying to separate the ego from the self. Despite the fact that our ego is only attached to us in this earthly plane, it is equally as important as our higher self. Our Ego can be something quite positive. It is meant to help us to fully experience our physical existence – without our ego we truly would not learn. Our bodies are giant filters; we filter our lessons through both our ego and higher self. Depending on our understanding of the process, one can either speed up or slow down their Soul’s Mission.

You ask yourself, “How do I know which part of me is talking, is it the higher self or the ego?”

In every decision we make in life, we can choose to come from my ego or our higher self.  We tend to get two answers to every question, one that comes from my higher self, which always speaks first and one that is from my ego, which directly speaks second. Then we make a choice on which to follow. It’s a process that we all go through before making every decision, from as large as  ”What is my meaning?” to as small as “What I am going to wear today?”

The higher self speaks directly, to the point and is always calm, even a warning. It is assertive and comforting at the same time. Some people may have a physical reaction such as lightness of heart, a sense of bliss or true love, and excitement. When it warns, you feel almost robotic, you don’t panic.

For example, you are in a rush one morning. You grab your coat and keys and rush out the door, jump into your car and start the engine. The radio’s on with many distractions around. You look in your review mirror and start to go into reverse. A calm voice says to you in your head, “The door’s unlocked” or “You didn’t lock the door.” Everything in that moment is quiet for a second. You ask yourself, “Did I lock the door?”

You try to envision a replay of leaving the home. Did I?, Didn’t I?   Your ego makes you indecisive.  ”I don’t have time for this blah, blah, blah. I’m going to be late and so on.” Your ego distracts you. You feel that you must worry about the things you HAVE to do. The higher self gives you guidance and lets you make your own decision.

Here is the filter process; you are being given a choice. It would be in your best interest to stop, and go check that door. Or you could choose to ignore it and go on with your day. Your higher self (the internal guidance) has done its job: it has given you guidance. Your ego distracted you, it has done its job and have given you the ability to choose, what some will call… free will. This is how we learn your higher self looks out for your well being and makes life easy. Your ego distracts you, makes you indecisive, makes you worry and makes life seem hard.

With that being said, you are probably wondering if something BAD is going to happen because you ignored the message. Think of it this way: every single situation that you did not listen to your higher self is a perfect mistake. You would not learn without listening to your ego. Your ego helps you to truly learn. Without it you would have no choice.

The catch is once you have learned it, don’t repeat it again. Your ego comes from a place of jealousy, greed, worthlessness and it makes you feel as though you are small and not good enough. You get a job interview. You first reaction is happy, and then you start saying the “what if’s” to yourself. That’s your ego.

Why would anyone want to embrace that part of themselves? My answer is, because it helps you to learn who you are and why you are here on this earth.

All I ask of others is to recognize this internal process from within and grow from it. Get to know the internal conversations you have with your ego and higher self and try your best to come from that wonderful place of the higher self that is connected to God Consciousness.

That is truly how you are going to understand your meaning in life. The harder that you try to push the ego away, the stronger the internal fight. It has you where it wants you, to make no decision at all, to stay in that same energy with no change.

You are an ever changing being, you are not the same person you were a minute ago. You are continuously learning, even if your ego wants to admit it or not.

Because you are ever changing, you can change your thought process by what I call shaping your ego.

How do you shape your ego? You do so by calling yourself on it. The more that you call yourself on ego, the louder your higherself will get. You have to work on it.

I begin with a simple exercise with my clients. I ask them to look in the mirror and say to themselves either aloud or inside every morning after brushing their teeth, “Today I come from my higher self, not from my ego.” It’s like reprogramming your thought process. I have them say this to themselves at least ten times.

What happens is you feel a shift in the chest area or the area of your belly button. It’s an energy shift; you are affirming this to yourself. The key is making you believe that this is true. If this was the first time that I started to shape my ego, I could say it once and you know that you don’t really mean it because your ego is not believing it. I have to affirm that my higher self is in control, not my earth bound ego.

What happens is that your ego eventually becomes the weaker part of you and the higher self becomes more prevalent. Your ego’s voice becomes quieter because you start to easily brush off the part of you that speaks second. As I said, it is still there, so do not be fooled, it can and will rear its ugly head in certain circumstances. What happens is that you are able to understand and deal with it better and make a choice to come from your higher self much more easily.

Once we start to get a hold on our own duality, the big question is, “What is my meaning and what are my lessons for my soul’s journey?”

Reflect back, in your past. Don’t go back there, just observe. What has been a repetitive situation in my dealings with others? Am I still in that cycle? Do I still attract the same situations?

That is where you need to start. You must close one door to walk through another. You must come to a place of making a change, so that the universe can usher in new beginnings.

You will also notice in time of reflection, your higher self has always been a good friend to you. It has and will always encourage you to follow your path. It will never pressure you or make you feel that you lost your chance because you turned it down. That’s your ego. When things are meant to be either a life lesson or soul progression, it will always visit you and hope that you will notice the signs to move forward because we have free will and it can only guide us, not make a decision for us.

When I observe the past, I know that my life’s journey is to write and coach others to find their life’s meaning when they feel lost, by being an example of truly understanding and fully living the struggle of the duality. I can say I know my meaning.

So far through my filter process, I know that I am making decisions from my higher self and truly living out my life’s purpose.

Just because I know my meaning, everyone presently in my life, and the ones to come, will help me to fully live and learn my meaning. These souls help me to fully live in my physical existence.

We are unique, but need each other to live out our soul’s journey. Please take a minute and thank everyone and everything that has been with you already in this life time. Thank both the positive and the negative, for you would not be where you are and what you will be without it. That is when you start to truly live.

Photo Credit: Max Elman

Each of us gets stuck from time to time, and we always wonder why we aren’t able to make things happen the way we want them to. Rarely does the key come to unlock the block so we generally just have to wait it out, and that sets up a cycle that begins to perpetuate itself.

While we wait for the answer or the “ahah” moment that will move us back into the flow, we often ponder what’s going on in our life.  “What am I waiting for—and why?” I am one of the first to be able to identify this trait in others, but I tend to excuse it away in myself. This morning I decided to look deeper into the cause and effect that procrastination has in my life.  Underlying this behavior, I found the root cause to be fear. There were questions there as well:

-          What if I can’t?

-          Where do I begin?

-          What will I do when I am done?

These are all fear-based questions that keep me from focusing on the task at hand. They act like blinders preventing me from seeing all the possibilities and stopping me from taking the first step toward my goal.

I also found that procrastination is viral. Once I allow it to stop a single project or task, it quickly spreads to the next one, and before long I am totally paralyzed, completely off track, and rapidly heading into something either unhealthy, unproductive or both. Some of the time-wasters that pop up for me in this space are Freecell, Facebook, mindless eating or just going to bed. What are your detractors?

The most profound thing I found, however, was the long-term effect of procrastination. It blocks achievement. You can’t win in the game of life if you don’t show up. Even the tiniest task avoided has a ripple effect that halts the flow of manifestation. It actually can keep you from achieving your most desired goal! Everything is connected, but I had never looked at it that way before!

Start with baby steps since everything is connected. Even completing the most minimal task progresses you towards the attainment of your greatest creation. The more tasks you finish the easier it becomes, not only to begin the next one, but to complete it as well! Start NOW. Every little bit counts, and soon the trickle of energy you expend will become a tsunami you can surf all the way to success.

Photo Credit: Kate Williams

When is this chaos going to end? Where are we all going? What are we trying to accomplish by living our lives in pursuit of something we can never seem to catch? We’re always trying to get a better job, to improve our relationships, pay off our bills, get a better car or house or boat or…you name it. We think that once we have these things, we’ll finally be happy. The truth is, there will never be an end to the chase until we realize that more stuff won’t ever make us permanently happy.

The Non-Pursuit of Happiness

We just want to be happy. But we’re so busy rushing around that we’re letting our lives pass us by with barely a notice. There are so many great people and great moments that we could really enjoy if we noticed them. True happiness is scattered all around us, tucked neatly away in the little moments of our lives that slip quietly by. But we’re just going through the motions, sleep-walking through our lives, only taking in a small fraction of the experience of living.

What is Mindful Happiness?

The solution to all this sleep-walking and missing out on the pleasures of our own lives is to practice mindful happiness. What is mindful happiness? It’s like regular happiness, but it lasts longer and is experienced more frequently and with full awareness. Here’s how it works.

How to Practice Mindful Happiness

1) When you find yourself in a situation that you know you enjoy, make it a point to soak in every last drop of the experience with your eyes and attention wide open. Don’t let a single drop of this experience be missed. Being mindful means keeping your attention on the present moment. And if you’re having a great time or wonderful experience, recognize that you are happy; that you are right in the middle of having a happy experience. Enjoy it, share it, love it!

2) Make it a point to schedule experiences throughout your week that you think you’ll enjoy. Then be mindful of how happy you feel while having these experiences. Try new things, taste new foods, or listen to new music, try a new hobby, do things that use all your senses, challenge yourself, look at old things in a new way, think new thoughts, etc. You don’t have to spend any money. Just notice the little details of every meaningful moment that passes by. Any experience that brings you joy and happiness is another opportunity to practice mindful happiness.

Studies have shown that people remember experiences far longer than they remember the things they buy or the gifts they’ve received. Knowing this, you can plan many wonderful experiences for your life. Being happy boosts your sense of well-being and keeps you healthier. People who are happy find it easier to accomplish their goals or be optimistic, which makes them even happier.

Don’t wait for happiness to come to you, and stop chasing after it. Happiness is a state of awareness. What good is it to be happy when you don’t even realize when you’re happy? Don’t just practice happiness, practice mindful happiness. It’s a waste of precious time if you’re happy but you’re not paying enough attention to even realize it. Don’t waste another minute. Live your life to the fullest.

Last night most of America watched the hottest show, The Voice. Although I’d never seen the show before, I watched it, cheering for a young woman named Dia Frampton, who performed a new song called, Inventing Shadows. I was very interested because this song  was co-written by my Grammy Award-winning, songwriter son-in-law, Josh Kear.

Dia Frampton

The lyrics talk about a fearful man who is always inventing shadows where there are none, and seeing negative things that don’t exist. With the combination of the lyrics, the unique quality of Dia’s voice and the haunting melody, once you hear the song, it’s almost impossible to get it out of your head. (If you haven’t heard it yet, you can download it on iTunes.)

Last night and again this morning, I listened to the song and realized a deeper meaning that I believe we can all identify with. Just yesterday a coaching client shared a list of all the things that could go wrong in his life- as if they were all going to go wrong! “What if I get laid off from my job, what if I can’t pay the rent next month, what if my wife leaves me, what if I get sick, what if my kids don’t make the sports team?…”

He’s inventing shadows, as we all do from time to time, imaging everything that could go wrong. But, think about it….If what we focus on grows, then we certainly don’t want to be focusing on the shadows! Life is so much more rewarding when we focus on what we choose rather than on what we fear!

This made me think…. where in my life am I inventing shadows? Where do I create negative thoughts where they don’t belong? What shadowy beliefs do I hold that make me respond in one way rather than another? And more importantly, how could my life improve if I no longer held onto the shadowy beliefs that no longer serve me?

Inventing Shadows is a great reminder for me to look deeper into my own life and to consciously create the life I choose. So for that Josh and Dia, thank you. The only question that now remains is how do I get this song out of my head?

My world changed one week ago, when my mother had a stroke. One minute she was pulling weeds in her garden and the next minute she was in a coma in the hospital, from a blood vessel that had burst in her brain. When I got the news, I flew from our home in Montana to my hometown in Pennsylvania.

Even though I left as soon as possible, my mother never regained consciousness, and passed away the day after I arrived. I was blessed to spend her last night by her bedside in the hospital and talked with her most of the night, convinced that she could hear me.

I was holding her hand on Wednesday afternoon as she took her last breath, along with my father and my siblings, surrounded by many of her grandchildren.

I always thought I’d have more time. There are still so many things on my list that I want to do with my parents, and I always thought we’d do them “someday”. I always thought my parents would get sick, we’d spend time together and then they’d pass away. I thought they’d be “old”, would have lived a full life, and I’d be okay with the separation. I didn’t expect to feel like my heart was being ripped out of my body.

When my maternal grandmother died about 8 years ago, I couldn’t understand why my mother was so sad. My grandmother lived a long and happy life for 97 years. With the passing of my mother, no matter the age of their passing, I now understand. Some things have to be experienced for us to “get it”.

I didn’t expect our last telephone conversation just a few days before to be the last time I’d ever hear my mother’s voice. I’m so grateful that as always, we both ended the call with, “I love you”.

This whole experience has been surreal for me. My mom was the poster child for senior health. At 77, she looked like she was in her early 60′s and still worked out regularly. She was full of energy and was always busy helping someone else. For her, giving wasn’t something that she did, it was who she was and her way of life. From volunteering at the local senior home to building houses for charity or helping a neighbor, my mom lived to give.

She’s been there for my father, my four siblings and me, the grandkids and great-grandkids and anyone else who needed anything.  She was the one that I turned to when I needed a shoulder, and the first one that I’d call to celebrate good news.

She was the one that I’d call for an opinion or for advice. Just last week when I got the phone call from my sister telling me about my mom’s stroke, I quickly packed for the trip. Understanding the seriousness of the situation, I decided to pack a dress for a memorial service, just in case. I couldn’t find the right black dress, but found a brown one instead. As I pulled it out of my closet, my first thought was, “Can I wear a brown dress to a funeral?” My first instinct was to call Mom and ask her… and that’s when it really hit me. If I needed the dress, it would be for her funeral…. and I didn’t think she’d mind if it was brown.

Sunday we celebrated my mother’s life at a beautiful memorial service with more than 400 friends and family. They all came to offer their condolences, share stories of her life and celebrate this amazing woman that I was lucky enough to call my mother.

As I write this blog on the airplane returning to Montana, my mind is still spinning. It’s still not real. I still expect her to call me when I get home. I’m still processing the whirlwind week and the finality of losing my mother. As a writer, I’m sure many of my upcoming blogs will be inspired by the wisdom of my mom, and from the bittersweet beauty of this experience.

I know that love never dies, that our loved ones are with us always, and that the memory of my mother will live in my heart forever. I also know that life is short and we never know when we’ll have our last opportunity to say the things we want to say, until the moment is gone.

So, if you want to say, “I love you”, go say it now. If you need to say, “I’m sorry” or “I forgive you”, go say it now. Go do the things you want to do with those that you love- now. Don’t think that you’re too busy or that you can do it tomorrow, for tomorrow may never come.

As I close this with a grateful yet very heavy heart, I have to share a tweet that was sent to me by a friend, which sums up my feelings perfectly…….

Your mom is going to make such a beautiful butterfly… but we’re sure going to miss the caterpillar.

Hugs,

Gail

p.s. THANK YOU for the many emails, tweets, Facebook posts and phone calls… your love and support during this difficult time mean the world to me!

A 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud woman, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with her hair fashionably combed, even though she is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.

Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready.

On the long walk to the elevator, as she paused to lean on her cane, the attendant provided a visual description of the woman’s tiny room.  “I love it”, she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.

“Mrs. Jones, you haven’t seen the room; just wait”, explained the attendant.

“That doesn’t have anything to do with it”, she replied. “Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged. Rather, it’s how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. It’s a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.”

The elderly woman continued, “Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I’ve stored away…. Just for this time in my life. Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw from what you’ve put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories! Thank you for your part in filling my Memory Bank, as I am still making deposits each day.”

According to Mrs. Jones, being happy is a choice we make each day, and it’s simple if we just remember these five rules:

1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.

Choose to be happy in this very moment. Then share your happiness (and this post) with someone you love. :)



Most of you have already graduated from high school, and many from college. As a gift to my cousin and to my nephew, both of whom are graduating from high school this week, I’m asking for your help in compiling life advice to a graduate.

What do you know now that you wish you’d known then? Looking back, what wisdom might have made a difference in your life if you knew it at 18 years of age?

What advice would you give to a high school graduate on how to live a happy, successful and meaningful life?

Feel free to answer the same question for what you would share with a college graduate too, but please specify either high school graduate or college graduate in your answer, if the answers are different. Also, please include the number of years since your graduation (high school or college).

Thank you in advance for your comments and for sharing your wisdom with others. I love our InspireMeToday.com community and I’m grateful that you’re a part of it.

I had one experience that I really wanted to share with you, as this blog wrote itself because of this  experience. My daughter and son-in-law treated us to the gift of a foot massage at a Thai spa in Prague. But, this wasn’t an ordinary foot massage- it was a foot massage by a school of fish! (I know… when I first heard about this I cringed too!)

The concept sounds easy…. You sit on a couch with your feet immersed in a tank full of fish and the little fish eat the dead skin off of your feet. To make the experience more memorable, you’re facing a plate glass window on one of the busiest pedestrian streets in Prague, with constant tourists passing by.

Fish massage at the Thai Spa

As I slowly placed my feet into the tank, I have to admit there was a bit of hesitation. Just by dipping my heel into the water the little fish were all over it. The owner of the spa asked me to be quiet, as I shrieked as the fish tickled my foot. The experience was so intense! After a minute or so with just my heel, one at a time, I slowly submerged the rest of my foot into the water, only to have them both immediately covered with about a hundred 2″ fish, busy munching away. It took every ounce of restraint I had, not to kick the fish away or pull my feet out of the water.

After a few minutes, the tickling sensation died down to a constant feeling of movement with just an occasional tickle. What I really noticed was that I could watch one specific fish munch on my toe, and I could feel THAT fish, in the midst of all the other ones. What I focused on mattered. The intense tickling sensation that I originally felt, dulled to what I thought of as background noise, as the feeling from each fish became the prominent feeling- when I focused on it.

The fish are eating my feet!

My feet were in the tank for 30 minutes, yet it seemed like much less- because I was fully present in the moment. I was mesmerized following an individual fish and concentrating my focus. The experience became a meditation that was only broken when a brave fish would swim between my toes. I had no thoughts of “where are we going for lunch”, “what do you want to see this afternoon” or “do you think it will rain today”… the only thing I could focus on was this experience. I was fully present in the moment.

It was entertaining to watch the reactions of groups of people walking by. Most would look and continue walking for another step, then stop and do a double take, as their brain registered what they were seeing. Most people stopped, pointed, gawked, cringed and eventually, took photos. The camaraderie with the passing community was an important part of the adventure.

It took hundreds of little fish munching on my feet to remind me that what sometimes seems unbearable, can become background noise within minutes, that people can bond over the silliest of things, and that the only moment that truly matters is this very one we’re experiencing NOW.

So today, I’m asking myself… What in my life, that was once a problem, has now become background noise for me? What specific “fish” am I focused on today? How are the experiences of my life today bonding me with those around me? What can I experience today that will remind me of the beauty of being present in this very moment?

In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it helps to remember that life is such a beautiful gift to be treasured, moment by moment. And, we can learn something every day, even if the lesson comes from  a school of small fish.

This city inspires me!

Hugs,

Gail

Last week, I had the pleasure of interviewing today’s Inspirational Luminary, Maureen Hancock. After an hour of questions, I thanked Maureen and our interview ended. That’s when she asked me if I’d like to “speak” to anyone. To explain this in the proper context, Maureen is a spirit medium who has been communicating with dead people since she was a small child.

After reading her book, The Medium Next Door: Adventures of a Real-Life Ghost Whisperer, I wanted to interview this woman who has one of the most unique “jobs” of anyone I know.

After all, at some point in our life, I think we all wonder what happens when we die. Is there a heaven? What about hell? Does our spirit live on in a different form? Most of us turn to religion for answers. Yet ironically, our history is fraught with wars fought over religious differences, because one group thinks they understand the teachings of love better than another does.

People may walk different religious paths, yet at the core of who we are, I believe we’re all the same. Having questions of my own, I set out on a search 30 years ago, devouring religious texts, exploring the world of metaphysics and questioning the mysteries of life. It’s no surprise that the television show, Medium, was one of my favorites.

When I heard about Maureen, I wanted to talk with this renowned spirit medium, teacher, lecturer, and holistic healer. I wanted to know more and hear first-hand how she works with this gift. And, after spending an hour with this bright light, my questions were replaced with a deep sense of peace and an overwhelming feeling of unconditional love.

Our conversation reawakened something deep within. In my “conversation” with my mother-in-law, she shared things that removed all doubt as to who she was. She even went as far as to ask me to tell my husband (her son) to fix the tire on his truck, as she keeps seeing him fill the tire with air. (Indeed, he has a problem with the tire and has been filling it each week rather than fixing the slow leak! How did she know that?!)

Regardless of the words or the proof, the important part for me was knowing that my mother-in-law was radiant, happy and above all, whole once again. What I felt and heard, was an overwhelming outpouring of one thing- love. Although we may leave our bodies at the end of our Earthly journey, the energy of who we are can never die. Love never dies. Our loved ones are still here with us and the separation that we feel is only an illusion.

Maureen has reached thousands of people on the other side, who come from all walks of life, different religions, races, genders and national origins. But no matter their story, certain things are constant- at the soul level, we are all the same and love never dies.

When I think of some of the things I was concerned about prior to our telephone call, I almost chuckle at how trivial my “problems” seemed to be. When all is said and done and it is our time to return home and we realize that love never dies, I think the biggest question we’ll ask is, “Did we love fully?” For at the end of the day, we’re back to love as the common denominator that runs through our lives here and obviously on the other side too. Kinda makes me want to go and hug someone right now… knowing that the love shared will always be there.

The vast majority of us believe in God and follow one religion or another, yet still find it easy to be unkind to one another. We label ourselves as Christian, Muslim, Jewish or whatever, yet go against the very tenants of the religion be being mean to one another. We pray for peace yet don’t act peaceful. We pray for kindness and act selfish.  What will it take for us to live what we pray?

I believe it’s a conscious choice we get to make each day to JUST BE KIND!

If you want someone to show kindness to you, be kind to others. If you want someone to be a friend, first be a friend to others. If you want others to say good things about you, say good things about others. Wish for others what you wish for yourself.

What would the world look like if kindness were our default mode? Imagine politicians who could only say kind things about one another. Imagine divorce court where only good things could be said about the other person. Imagine sharing freely, knowing there is enough for everyone. When will the time come that we make kindness our default mode? What will it take?

Kindness starts with us, in this very moment.  Kindness is meant to be shared indiscriminately and doesn’t mean anything until we’re kind to everyone.

For what is kindness, but an expression of love in action? Kindness is treating others how you want to be treated, with care, respect, compassion and love, in thought, spoken word and action. Kindness is speaking up to right a wrong and remaining quiet when you have nothing nice to say. It is reaching out to another without being asked, showing empathy, sharing our humanity, offering charity and not always having the need to be right.

Technically defined as the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate, kindness is the common thread of all religions and does not acknowledge the artificial social, economic, and religious barriers we create, but rather, kindness reaches out with love to touch the lives of others and makes a tangible difference.

For each religion, the words may be different but the core belief is the same…

Bahá’í Faith
Lay not on any soul a load that you would not wish to be laid upon you, and desire not for anyone the things you would not desire for yourself. – Bahá’u'lláh, Gleanings

Buddhism
Treat not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful. – The Buddha, Udana-Varga 5.18

Christianity
In everything, do to others as you would have them do to you; for this is the law and the prophets. – Jesus, Matthew 7:12

Confucianism
One word which sums up the basis of all good conduct….loving-kindness. Do not do to others what you do not want  done to yourself. – Confucius, Analects 15.23

Hinduism
This is the sum of duty: do not do to others what would cause pain if done to you. – Mahabharata 5:1517

Islam
Not one of you truly believes until you wish for others what you wish for yourself. – The Prophet Muhammad, Hadith

Jainism
One should treat all creatures in the world as one would like to be treated. – Mahavira, Sutrakritanga 1.11.33

Judaism
What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbour. This is the whole Torah; all the rest is commentary. Go and learn it. – Hillel, Talmud, Shabbath 31a

Native Spirituality
We are as much alive as we keep the earth alive. – Chief Dan George

Sikhism
I am a stranger to no one; and no one is a stranger to me. Indeed, I am a friend to all. – Guru Granth Sahib, p.1299

Taoism
Regard your neighbour’s gain as your own gain and your neighbour’s loss as your own loss. – Lao Tzu, T’ai Shang Kan Ying P’ien, 213-218

Unitarianism
We affirm and promote respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part. – Unitarian principle

Zoroastrianism
Do not do unto others whatever is injurious to yourself. – Shayast-na-Shayast 13.29

(Acknowledgements: This original English version was prepared by Paul McKenna.)

Isn’t it an oxymoron that all religions teach the practice of loving kindness, yet we use our differences in religion to justify being unkind to one another? Perhaps it’s time to make kindness a conscious choice rather than a random act.

Regardless of the religious path we choose to walk, let kindness be our constant companion. Rather than label ourselves and carry limiting religious beliefs that separate us from one another, choose to focus on the common thread that weaves all of us together- kindness. As the Dalai Lama said, “My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.”

So today, BE CONSCIOUSLY KIND. In every action, ask yourself, “Am I being kind?” Let’s find a way to live what we pray, and make kindness our default mode. Whether it’s in rush hour traffic or climbing the corporate ladder- the fastest way to get where you want to be, is by showing kindness to others along the way.

No matter how small, no act of kindness can ever be wasted. Over time, people will forget what you say or do, but they will long remember your kindness.

As a tribute to all of the great mothers, @InspireMeToday reached out to our friends on Twitter and asked this question…

What’s the #1 thing that your mom taught you, that you are the MOST grateful for?

Just reading the tweets as they arrived, I smiled, laughed, shook my head in agreement and most of all, felt warm inside with the outpouring of such love for our Mamas. Enjoy it and share it with you mom or anyone else you know who has a mom. :)

Here’s what more than 100 folks who responded had to say….

(By the way, this is a great list of caring, interactive peeps who would be great to follow on Twitter. Just click on their name which is a live link, and happy following!)

GlobalPilot- My mother taught me compassion- the ability to see myself in someone else’s shoes and have an understanding of what that must be like.

pandiorama She taught me how to balance my checkbook!

MoniqueVargas That all races are equal. My mom never looks at skin color or nationality.

mammaloves To maintain my sense of humor.  It has gotten me through more things….

nahtuhhlee To always leave something to the imagination! Its timeless.

HealthyLoserGal Mom taught me to keep in touch w/family: turn to them to share when u’re happy AND when you’re down. Even “family of choice”.

DorahMtetwa To work for your own money!

Megan_Lane The #1 my mom taught me was to always show gratitude for things given to us by saying thanks and sending thank you cards.

raygoodrich To never let your fears dictate your actions.

KankyPants My mom always told me to stand up for what i believe in & not to let anyone stop me from doing the right thing!♥

LoveSays Love is all there is. Feel it, be it, share it!

tessneale The #1 thing my mum taught me: the importance of independence and doing what I believe in…no matter what. ♥

angelmarie_3 That you have to work for what you want and never disrespect your elders. :)

laurenamcmullen Listen 2 what people say about themselves. They usually tell the truth about that!

Claire_Barbie To always be nice and be the bigger person in situations where you need to be :)

EvelynBrooks My mother taught me a love of books and learning!

Rockstarkat That hating gets you nowhere & to do all things with love.

bernhardtmd #MyMamaToldMe “Don’t just seek someone you want to live with. Seek someone you don’t want to live without.”

McMedia Unconditional Love … my mother never judges. She is kind & supportive. I am so blessed!

CoCreatr #1 mom taught (without ever voicing it): think for yourself, try out to see what works for you and who you want to be with.

unmarketing Never give up. Oh, and always mind your manners :)

mharlesmarkley Always be accountable for your actions.

chrisbrogan Manners. :)

barefoot_exec My mom said ‘if it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right the 1st time’.

bettybhip To always lend a hand and be generous even if you don’t have a lot to share, always room for 1 more at the table.

LarryHochman My mother role modeled kindness. It wasn’t in the words…it was in the way she treated people. It’s how we learn.  :)

AlohaArleen Maybe is not a commitment. One must commit to make things happen.

SuzieCheel There is always time to stop & talk, to share a kind word, offer a helping hand or just to listen to a friend or a stranger.

comeandreceive How to say “I’m sorry”.

JennyBaechler “You’re never stuck.”

Mark_Tress My grandma would say “before you speak, think twice… Then Shut up.”

HoneyLi To make sure to have your own, everytime you get some money, put $20 away and don’t touch it. You will know when u need it and it won’t be for a purse or pair of shoes.

carlpeterson My mom taught me by example to not say unkind things about other people.

JeanetteJoy My mom taught me to be happy even when your life is too sad. (She had a terrible time, orphan, Great Depression, WWII, deaths)

marthalory Mom taught me that praying nonstop with tears will surely change something, even it takes whole life to wait.

neekAboo She taught me how to love without expecting.

Prosperous_One How to respect, educate & most of all, to LOVE myself!

Marcus_Costello Patience and to listen to other peoples opinions as a closed mind is a wasted mind.

slapyourfacexx I don’t know if its considered as taught, but it would be love!! :) W/o her love I can’t be who i am today and have a heart for others.

feifei777 My g-ma told me that I was a PRINCESS & deserved to be treated like one & never accept less. I now tell my daughter.

raysunshine77 To be grateful for everything I have, not bitter for what I’ve lost or jealous of what others have.

PraiseWorks Tomorrow is another oppportunity another chance to do better than the day before.

memeemmil Being independent and how to make your surroundings clean and neat. :)

Elle_Chasing20 Oh my- just one!? To always celebrate our disappointments rather than dwelling on them. Greater things ahead :)

rythmnations My mom taught me to think for myself, and not to follow what everyone else is doing! Be the trend setter not the trendy one!

zachbergen That I was loved.

BrennaDaniels My mom taught me what it feels like to be loved unconditionally. I don’t know who I would be if I didn’t have that :)

joysays She taught me that being happy and supportive is an important quality in friendships, loves & co-workrs. Spread ur happiness.

Daniela_Iakopa Mom taught to treat everyone well, to be grateful and raised a good healty food habits in me. Great.

bvisailing She taught me a love and appreciation for Nature and the natural beauty of this world.

MindfulBrook Funny one: never be the drunk girl that is puking or crying! Sincere: Find a man that’s good to his mama.

mylivingpower My mom taught me how to “read” people. To notice their spoken and unspoken messages. Annoying as a kid, awesome now!

nanceTO Always be financially independent!

CoCoNikole She taught me how to be independent & to not settle.  The sky is the limit!

kyhick Mom always said that if you truly love it is unconditional that is real love.

dearsusanbranch My mom (with 8 children) made something from nothing every day and taught me the meaning of creativity.

Texbard To find pleasure in simple things such as listening to birds sing or the scent of clean clothes fresh out of the dryer.

lovelyllamanda How to get up and go to work everyday, even when you dont want to- life still happens.

Cletae “Never give up” thats what she taught me.  She is a very strong woman :)

michelle_vw “Never depend your life to other person, your life, your responsibility”.

SueAtkins My Mum taught me to forgive quickly !  #parenting #moms #mums

janna4014 To be courteous and polite.

virenprajapati #1 thing  To “never cheat on u”. Meaning, never deceive yourself. Admit mistakes, never pretend coz over a time it becomes habitual.

lilyandlime To put others before yourself.

afuntanilla That I can do anything!

KristinKopp “Never say never. Never say always. And… always be true to yourself!” really!

BudafullyGreen When you speak to people, filter it through your heart. People can hear even difficult things differently. ~My Mom I ♥ her!

PhillipHoffman Show up on time.

BelleDuchess Kneel down and pray, as God has all the answers in all situations.

brianoberman The most important thing that mom taught me that I’m the most grateful for: faith.  Faith in everything, including others.

eepings That love knows no boundaries, no conditions, no pain – it only knows giving, and more giving. Love is action and demonstrations. She shows me what love is, what it looks and feels like.

azjuancafe My mom taught me to keep an open heart and mind.

arielleford Mom showed me that I can do ANYTHING I put my mind to! She was right.

kuteblackson That love is the most powerful force on the planet!

Z_MBA She taught me that nothing happens to you is really that big of a deal, so let things go.

sqlpro Never become like your dad!

bamslynette Laugh outloud and laugh often, because life is too short for frowns.

VA_Grown “This too shall pass.” (her version of don’t sweat the small stuff–or really any stuff!)

kakashigurl One thing? Hmm.. Never ever lose hope.. :)

LisaScales That being a girl has no restrictions – you can do what ever you want & be whoever you want to be :)

takeaminute2 I’m most grateful to my mum for teaching me how to cook. Making her American Roast Beef recipe right now!

tmr106 Always, always be a lady :)

TiffiTaffy How to pray, and how to be faithful to God. My mom gave me advice on Tuesday or Wednesday last week, by Friday, it worked.

marcymassura ‘Never comingle your funds’ #1

Lennisport I can do ANYTHING I put my mind to! #thxmom

dthurston11 My mom taught me that there are only 2 things with which I have control.  My attitude and my effort. Can’t control anyone else.

ladyinredonline My Mom taught me that ordinary women rarely make history!

Stewpot Mother always told me size isn’t everything.

catherinebybee Don’t date someone you wouldn’t want to marry. You never know who you’ll fall in love with.

IdealSamples My mom taught me how to always be true to myself and not worry about others – this has made me the woman i am today.

vancauw Family..

janetjoy Most imp thing my #mom taught me was to believe in myself. She also taught me that anger and love can coexist. Invaluable!

GraceHospiceOK Know that you can do anything you think you can!  Have positive thoughts.

JaytotheTee My mom taught me how to get what needs to be done done and carry on.

ScottMilford My mom taught me, through her demonstration, how to be a caring person, and why it’s important to care. Priceless!

jwatsoncreative Patience with others, creative thinking in all situations and kindness through out all my days #thanksmom

mamalola03 To respect yourself.

champlings My mom taught me to always pray to and trust in God :)

Jessy1822 My mom always taught me to live each day to the fullest!

stanromsley To forgive your brother and sister…

NBurmanDesign Cleaning up after myself! It’s not only good for me, it’s good for those I live with.

sharbowers Honesty is the best policy.

Thecommich I’m grateful to my Grandma, for teaching me to be a lady (or trying anyway!). Good manners and kindness are SO important.

QueenCDJ My mom taught me to be an asset, not a liability.  Always bring something of value to the table in every situation.

BudBilanich My mother showed, not taught — me the importance of hard work and persistence.

MikeCrossland My mum taught me that regardless of the challenges that lay ahead of us, with belief, hope and determination the impossible can be made possible.

PricelessParent My mom taught me that there are plenty of people in need. Your purpose is to find someone to help and help them.  She taught me this by demonstrating it every day.

Kellymotivates Never talk bad about anyone and if anyone talks bad about you, just hold your head high :) #nogossip

DuongSheahan @inspiremetoday Mom taught us HUMILTY as she is epitome of. He who humbles himself will be exalted, he who exalts himself will be humbled.

JayLink_ ummm not to torture small animals or she would beat me with a rubber hose  …. wait..wait I was kidding.. My mom taught me to love all people & to forgive your enemies!

vivavelo She was very much into teaching us how to spell properly – it’s helped me all my life! Especially now that I write a lot. XO

ABluePearl #Moma said: Never, ever fight over a man. If he’s yours, it’s not necessary; if he’s not, you have no business there.

tomjd That I can do anything!

BloggingBizMom To always consider another’s feelings before speaking or acting…..

MaLiKCeaSar3 My mom taught me how to love.

WendyGYoung My mother taught me not to gossip and I have held to that my entire life.

What’s the #1 thing that your mom taught you, that you are the MOST grateful for?

PLEASE ADD YOUR ANSWER BELOW, AS WELL AS ANY COMMENTS TO SHARE WITH OUR COMMUNITY. THANK YOU!

Our sincere thanks to everyone for your contribution. Please check out the compilation featured this Sunday on Mother’s Day, as our Today’s Brilliance feature. Share it with you Mother with thanks, and with your children, with hope. :)

While part of me was relieved that the head of the snake known as Al Qaeda had been chopped off, part of me felt a sadness at our revelry. Don’t get me wrong- I was happy to hear that bin Laden could no longer spread his hate for America. I love this country and I’ve spent a good deal of my time/resources supporting our troops, even creating and delivering the World’s Longest Letter of Love and Support to our troops, when I accompanied my daughter on a month-long tour of Iraq and six countries in the Persian Gulf. I love the ideals that America stands for and I’m proud to be an American.

While a part of me was greatly relieved at the extinguishing of a force of evil, like many of us, another part was conflicted inside. Even knowing the horrific, unspeakable acts that Bin Laden was responsible for, I still had incongruous thoughts inside between the “eye for an eye” teachings of the Old Testament, versus the all-loving teachings of “turn the other cheek” from the New Testament. Although I would categorize myself as spiritual rather than religious, I still asked myself, “What would Jesus think? What would Mother Teresa do? What would Gandhi say? What would Mohammad feel? What would the Dalai Lama tweet?”

This morning, I’m grateful that the world may be a more peaceful place. Osama bin Laden and Al Queda represent the worst of humanity. They are murderers and since the attack on 9/11, many have lived in a state of fear. From that perspective, it seems only natural to celebrate something that begins to chip away at the layers of fear that terrorism has created. Al Qaeda did their unspeakable acts, and we, in turn, demanded retribution. Many felt justified in killing bin Laden, and even in celebrating our victory.

Yet, a part of me wondered if this was morally wrong. This is not a simple discussion, as evidenced by Twitter, which was a buzz with tweets ranging from celebratory tweets like “#ObamaGotOsama- We got him!” to tweets questioning why we can’t celebrate peace instead of death. Both the Atlantic and Christianity Today took it one step further and posted a blog of tweets from Twitter with conflicting quotes from scripture, arguing various Biblical positions.

It wasn’t until I processed this conflict with my husband today that I felt I had personally reached a place of greater understanding. As humans, we love to celebrate. Just watching the fans of a winning sports team after victory, shows how the camaraderie and connectedness we feel almost acts as an emotional release for the stress of everyday life. I understand that as humans, winning makes us feel better. The end of Osama bin Laden’s hatred was a cause for great relief.

The majority of the people celebrating on the streets were young people. As a 52 year old, 10 years isn’t a significant chunk of time for me, but as a 20 year-old, the world they knew just ten years ago, when they were just 10 years old, is dramatically different. Their perspective is altered as half of their lives they’ve known the fear of terrorism. Just imagining the impact of 9/11 on a 10 year old makes it easier to understand the outpouring of relief and even celebration we witnessed last night.

My parent’s generation had World War II, Hitler and the Korean War. We had Vietnam and the end of the Cold War with the falling of the Berlin Wall. Do you remember how we celebrated the end of these events? We all know it would be naive to think that the war on terrorism is over.  But, I believe the death of Osama bin Laden will go down in history, not as a celebration of his death, but as a milestone towards peace.

I can only imagine the sense of relief that the families of those who died on 9/11 must be feeling right now. I’d like to think that rather than rejoicing at the killing of a specific person, we, as a country, are celebrating the end of a tortured chapter that has remained open for the last decade. We are taking solace in a sense of accomplishment and closure. We are celebrating that, with the elimination of a force of evil, we are one step closer to peace on Earth.

As you watched the special news coverage last night, what did it bring up for you? Were you joyful, reflective, or oblivious? Were you in any way conflicted by your personal feelings of relief and celebration versus your religious or spiritual beliefs? Do you feel safer today than you did yesterday?

Last night, we watched history in the making, and today we have the opportunity to discuss it and learn from it. Many Americans have paid and continue to pay a big price for our freedom. One of the benefits of living in a free country is that regardless of our opinion, we have the ability to speak out and voice it.

As I see it, the opportunity here isn’t in being right or in proving someone else wrong, but rather, in looking within to find the deeper meaning for ourselves. Please share your thoughts below in the hopes that regardless of our race, nationality, religion, gender, age or sexual orientation, we can find deeper meaning, learn from the past, celebrate the good things in our world and take one step closer to creating a greater global understanding.

As the words of the song remind us….  Let there be peace on Earth, and let it begin with me.

The proclamation underscores the power and the appeal of the Make A Promise idea.  I’m thrilled because it means people here in Westchester and beyond will learn about ‘Make A Promise Day’ and the power of making a promise.  And this builds momentum for other jurisdictions – like New York State and other states – to follow Westchester’s lead.  The more communities and states and countries we have embracing the ‘Make A Promise Day’ idea, the more this positive message about the unique power of making a promise will spread.  My mission is to share the power of making a promise with millions of people around the world.  And by doing so we’ll transform the world one person and one promise at a time.

I hope members of the Inspire Me Today community will join me in spreading the idea of Make A Promise and the power of making a promise to other locations and jurisdictions across the US and around the world.  Please ask your local, state, or national authorities to proclaim May 4^th to be Make A Promise Day.  Here’s a short YouTube video of me reading the Westchester County “Make A Promise Day” proclamation followed by the actual text of the proclamation that you can use to send a letter to your local supervisors, mayor, governor, legislative representatives, president or prime minister – you name it.  Thanks for helping me spread the word.  And please keep me posted about any developments or send me any comments to MatthewPromisesGmailcom  (MatthewPromisesGmailcom)  .

Click here to watch my short video about Mr. Astorino’s proclamation:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fXex1ZjpXs

Following is the full text of the proclamation:

Office of the County Executive

Westchester County, New York

Proclamation

WHEREAS:  The Town Board of Yorktown, New York, unanimously adopted a resolution on February 15, 2011, proclaiming May 4, 2011 and each year thereafter to be MAKE A PROMISE DAY, and;

WHEREAS: MAKE A PROMISE DAY is the only unofficial “holiday” dedicated to personal empowerment, goal achievement and integrity enhancement, and;

WHEREAS: MAKE A PROMISE DAY encourages individuals to turn important goals into heartfelt promises, thereby increasing the probability of reaching those goals, and;

WHEREAS: Celebrating MAKE A PROMISE DAY will have the effect of enhancing accountability, personal responsibility and integrity, and;

The County Executive of Westchester County recognizes the value of highlighting the power of making and keeping promises on the part of local students, teachers, community organizations, businesses and political leaders;

NOW, THEREFORE, I, ROBERT ASTORINO, COUNTY EXECUTIVE OF WESTCHESTER COUNTY, do hereby proclaim May 4, 2011 and each year thereafter to be MAKE A PROMISE DAY and encourage organizations and individual members of the community to celebrate this very important day in a manner they deem to be suitable and appropriate.

 

Thanks for your support.  To Your Promise!

Matthew Cossolotto

www.MakeAPromiseDay.com
www.ThePodiumPro.com